Fultz Family

The Magic Continues...

2012-02-08T00:13:00.002-06:00

We've had out fair share of magic shows over the last little while. Connor shows us tricks that we "have never seen before" and he mysteriously whispers the phrase, "prepare...(pause for effect)...to be...(another creepy pause)...amazed" with his head tilted down, and eyes piercing your soul!

His "handy" side kick, Aiden, is always nearby...and by nearby, I mean close BEHIND, and even kneeling on the ground. I haven't quite figured out why he is almost hidden and behind...or, could it be that the amazing appearing and disappearing of items is simply a slight of hand?

Hmm...so perplexing!

Of course, their binky bound sister is learning their masterful tricks as well!

Intermission was brought to us by "Sprout"...probably Papa Bear...or maybe even Thomas! The magicians needed a mental break!

Today...there was no magic...

Well, if you call entertaining the girls with buckets of water and seeing the water "magically" disappear from the buckets time and again magic, then you can say it still goes on when the boys are away.

Maya walked to me today with her little yellow tea cup in hand and sweetly said, "Wa'er".

I couldn't resist, so I quickly swept the crumbs from the floor in preparation for its cleaning. We moped about three times in the course of an hour time, changed clothes, encouraged Maya with the counting game to stay out of Lydia's chair as she gathered more tea set supplies, and told each other, "I'm being very careful" as we walked across wet floors on our tippy toes for more toys and drinks.

Today Lydia had me laughing as she stood at the counter top, casually leaning on her elbows as I sewed away. She gently took Maya's hand away from the "off" button on the machine a number of times...often too late. In between garbles of talk, half of which were totally unrelated to my sewing skills, she said, numerous times, "Thanks Bob!" in the sweetest slangy voice she has ever uttered.

Bob? Bob who?

All did not end well for Lydia. She fell at scouts tonight, tore some skin off her big left toe and screamed the entire way home from scouts. Her whole body was shaking and heaving with pupils dilated and fixed on her owie. Aiden was genuinely concerned, and as I drove, exclaiming, "It's alright baby, when we get home, Mommy will take care of it," I glanced back and Aiden had the first aide kit out. His hand fumbled through the contents for a bandaid. As he retrieved one, and asked me to open it, I could see his concern worsen...in direct correlation to Lydia's panic.

Unfortunately, he could not ease her pain, and he felt the sorrow of watching his sweet sister suffer. Aiden's heart is made of gold with the words compassion written so clear and deep upon it.

I love this boy, my red headed little fire...who holds the fire of God in his tiny little frame.

Now, tell me...who would want to steal his food and his jacket??? Poor guy has been facing a thief this school year...and we are losing miserably.

Maya recently freaked Daddy out with her bath time tricks; he seriously thought Lydia was going to drown our little gal. Nope, this is all Maya! ;)

And in case you didn't forget, "Tin Can Man" is sitting proudly on our fridge....

Connor's teacher is requesting the tabs...they are hard to part with!

Homemaking

2012-02-05T09:27:00.002-06:00

I've been on a homemaking kick this week...standing at the counter-top and ironing board all day...

sewing...

cutting...

stamping...cleaning...

providing snacks and drinks...

and enjoying the fruits of my labors.

Steve and I are both nurses, so it wouldn't be surprising that there is always a bottle or 2 of hand sanitizer and lotion. I got tired of the clutter, so I threw them all into a basket with an accompanying sign that should read..."Clean and Soft (in) hand, heart, and word."

It encompasses everything we should be clean and soft in, on a spiritual note...physically, expressively, and within (spiritually). Just so happens that placing them by the physical reminder of hand sanitizer and lotion is a perfect symbol, and helps me make the clutter look cute!

How Do I Love Thee?

2012-02-03T23:44:00.001-06:00

It has been one rough week with these kiddos. From hours without sleep, to hours of homework, to hours of a husband who is on call 24/7 for a full week...

It's just been busy!

There were many nights when the kids went to bed in tears, and I went to bed with a heavy heart. The pressure of the world weighs so heavy on them at such a young age. They go to school for 7 hours a day, come home and do homework for 2-3 hours, have dinner, take a shower and get ready to head off to bed after just a few minutes of play. The boys express their stress over tests and responsibilities, while I sit back and wonder why they aren't just kids???

And allowed to be kids...

I worked Monday, on Tuesday I attempted to make homework time enjoyable--got a pizza with the last few dollars in my wallet, went to get happy hour drinks...and half of them went plummeting to the floor of the Ford. I wanted to cry, but I screamed...

...then the kids cried.

On Wednesday, I gathered the left over macaroni and cheese after desperately trying to get the place cleaned up before the school bus arrived. We took our swim suits to Mimi's house and used the hot tub for the evening. When we got home, the boys threw tantrums and screamed words at me strong enough to provoke me to walk away for the course of the night and leave their routine in their Dad's hands. The boys, with tears falling down their faces, yelled, "I'm sorry Mom, I love you...Do you forgive me?" Again, I went to bed with a heavy heart.

On Thursday, I woke determined to change the course of the week...I had spoken with my sister and let her know that I had tried so hard all week long and things were just getting worse. She informed me that the fact that I keep trying is what matters...I'd be a failure if I stoped trying in the end. So, I spent the entire day, a day late (2/2/2012), making quilted Valentine bags for all of my children. I picked them up from the bus stop and we made a trip to the grocery store.

Connor is quickly becoming more of a helper than a hindrance to a successful grocery trip!

He insisted that he do the work on his own!

We actually picked up pizza again...with lava cakes too! We were celebrating!

The kiddos all bathed themselves to pristine quality! Well, I bathed the girls, but Maya is showing me that she has no fear of laying down in the water...to enjoy the warmth up over her ears! She's a brave little gal!

Daddy wrote notes for the boys before he headed to work in the morning...I stuffed them into their bags as a sweet little surprise...

...well, I added Dove chocolates as well!

I worked away, and upon completion, the light bulbs in the kids heads went on, and they realized that all the "cool things" I was doing was for them!!!

And so the count down to Valentine's begins....

a day late!

But...even at a day late, it has begun...

and that's what matters most in the end.

It's never too late to make things better, to turn a heavy week into one of success, to change for the better...and to love.

They most certainly appreciated all of it!

The joy on their faces with Daddy's notes was priceless...

Now, that's the right way to raise a kiddo--to build them up when they do good instead of tearing them down when they have done bad. Way to go Daddy!

So, on the 2nd they were told, "As I have loved you, love one another." John 13:34

And today, they were informed that "I have loved thee with an everlasting love!" Jeremiah 31:3

Tea Anyone???

2012-02-03T22:19:00.003-06:00

Daddy initiated a tea party for the girls a few days ago. Everyone, eventually, was in attendance...

Maya had to look prim and proper with her hair pulled back...and yes, she did that her self!

Elmo became the guest of honor...and Daddy taught Maya how to do the best Elmo impersonation yet!

Is she REALLY 3???

2012-01-29T23:33:00.001-06:00

Last Monday was the 100th day of school...yep, the day when the 100day projects are due! I received fair warning from Connor's teacher, and was under the assumption that Aiden's teacher was okay with no 100 day celebration.

Still....we procrastinated until Monday morning!

My creative Mommy gears kicked in, and I found 100 coke can tabs...yes, I drink that much soda pop...and I sewed them onto a piece of paper to make the body of...

TIN CAN MAN!!!

It was 7:35, and I was ~~yelling at~~ gently telling Connor to, "Hurry and pack your lunch so we can get to the bus on time!"

He didn't pack his lunch.

So, I did...

PB crackers, a juice container, a M&M kudos bar, and prepackaged Ritz crackers...Connor was in heaven watching me throw lots of junk in his lunch box!

It was 7:40, and Aiden said, "I need a hundred day project too!"

Determined to make it to the bus stop on time (7:56), I threw beans into baggies, 100 to be exact, and he drew...

BEAN BOY!!!

We rushed off to the bus stop and made it on time!

Next...Lydia's 3 year appointment...

She measured 39 inches, the 90th percentile for height...

and 32 pounds, the 50th percentile for weight.

The doctor said she's tall and skinny...perfect! (I guess Mommy's not so perfect!)

While we waited for the doctor, I looked at Lydia's new boots and said, "Lydia how about we count the HEARTS on your new boots?" I was attempting to distract the girls from all the intricate doctor tools they were so desperate to touch, keep them from the chairs that were their own personal mountains to climb, and to make the computer they so sweetly broke the last time we were in appear invisible to their angel eyes!

Lydia yelled at me, "NO...I DON'T WANT TO COUNT THE HEARTS!"

Okay...

The doctor walked in moments later and assessed Lydia on all fronts...

She spoke with Lydia and said, "Lydia can you count yet?"

Lydia said, "Ya (and she points to her boots)...I can count the STARS on my boots!"

I'm thinking, I guess the doctor can put a big red X through the category SHAPES, she obviously doesn't know that! BUT...she counted to 12 for the doctor, and as the doctor listened and told me that Lydia is basically the size of a 4 year old, she exclaims, "Is she almost 4? When is your Birthday Lydia?" She went on to talk about how smart Lydia is, and how we will have full hands with her!

The doctor assessed Lydia's knowledge of her body parts...

She pointed at her nose, her cheeks, her knees (which she had to force the jeans up to show the doctor her little knees), and when she was asked where he MOUTH is, she pointed at me, her MOM!

As she begins her physical assessment of Lydia, I place her on the examining table, and the doctor says, "Let's see Lydia, do you know your colors?"

Of course, Lydia said "Ya" and went on to call pink "reel", white "....", and blue "grilln". I laughed as the doctor assured me that it's totally normal for her to not know her colors, and if she did she was going to start assessing her knowledge of the Presidents of the USA.

(I decided to withhold the fact that I was teaching my 3 year old son presidential facts 5 years ago!)

SO the doctor starts to look in Lydia's ears with an otoscope, and she says, "Lydia, what's your favorite thing to do at home?"

Lydia nervously stated, "Play with my ears!"

Now, you see, the doctor knows I am a PICU nurse, and my husband is a NICU and Peds specialty nurse as well...we talk about out jobs all the time, so when it came time to listen to Lydia's heart, you best be sure Lydia should have pointed to her heart when asked by the doctor, "Lydia, where is your heart?"

Lydia, without hesitation, opened her mouth as wide as she could, took her right index finger and stuck it in her mouth, pointing at her....

heart???

I was doubled over in hysterical laughter at this point, enjoying my favorite well visit amongst all 5 of my children!

When all was said and done, the doctor told her that she would be getting a shot today...she said, "Okay!" as cheerfully as she could!

After her shot, the tears poured endlessly along her little red cheeks.

She was offered a band-aid, and to my surprise she screamed until I removed the band-aid that was placed to comfort an "owwie". Then it hit me...she had ironically played with a dozen band-aids she found that morning, as though they were just stickers...

She was officially boycotting band-aids once and for all....because when you get a band-aid, it means you really get an owwie!

Maya shocked the doctor as she said, "I wan milk!" while the doctors head was turned in the opposite direction! When she turned to see the girls, she came to realize Maya was talking, and with a look of disbelief said, "That was Maya??? You guys really are in trouble!"

Lydia cried inconsolably, and on the way out the door, she said, between sobs and tears, "I want mozzarella sticks and a soda!" We made a Sonic stop...and everyone was happy as can be!

Lydia's Three...and Sweet as Can Be!

2012-01-22T23:24:00.000-06:00

Our little princess turned three Friday! Three years ago, I delivered her into her Daddy's hands in the middle of a hallway with the ones who adore her most frantically throwing towels, calling 911, and trying to keep kids away from the natural, but almost frightening sight to young eyes! It was a night to remember...a night given to us in grace after the loss of our son...a night when we heard and felt the Lord reaching out to us through the tiny cry of our baby girl.

Now Little Miss Lydia is three...and sweet as can be!

Her first Birthday request was to have Mimi (my Mom) at her Birthday party. Mimi is in Mexico! : (

We had cupcakes for breakfast! The boys were overjoyed when I walked into their room and delivered the announcement that they better get their behinds out of bed if they want cupcakes for breakfast before school starts. I have never seen my boys hop out of bed so fast...I should do this more often!

Each child presented their treasure!

With tired eyes of course!

Oh ya...we had donuts too!

I dressed Liddy in her new clothes from Christmas time...

And let her dig away at the treats!

We braved the winds and went to eat lunch with Aunt Sunny and the cousins at McD's!

We went to the park...and did her favorite thing (which is my favorite thing too!)...

I embraced the reality that I do have a triplet...just 2 and a half decades too late!

And then I watched her brave the big slides alone...for the first time ever!

When we got home, she changed into her jammies and we all waited patiently for Daddy to come home.

With her binky close by...we are working on that!

Daddy arrived with pizza and cake...and we continued our day of yummy delight and indulgence!

She explored her cake...and allowed me to frugally reuse the striped bag that Aunt Sunny packaged her puzzles, shirts, socks, and purse in. I also used a bag that I received gifts for her three years and 2 weeks ago on the night of her baby shower.

Lydia actually practices blowing out the candles before the candle was lit and the song was sung. She blowed several times and then said, "I can't do it!" She then looked at Connor and said, "Connor can do it!" As Connor pretended to blow out an unlit candle, she looked confused, disappointed, and frustrated as she exclaimed, "Connor can't do it!" I laughed and let her know that the candle has to be lit before you can change it by blowing at it! She understood only after she blew out a lit candle in one little breath!

She opened a card Daddy got her that sang a pretty tune from Tangled...we ended up dancing like ballerinas to the song repeatedly through the course of the night.

Can you see the delight? She LOVED the song!

Everyone loved the smurfette house...graciously saved from a late Christmas order.

When she got through her big striped bag, she pulled out a box. She lifted it up high in the air, and with eyes as wide as we have ever seen them, she yelled out, "A BOX!!!" When asked what it was, she excitedly said again, "A BOX!!!" The boys helped her open it, to reveal her new boots, to which she said, "MOMMY'S BOOTS!" She was so happy to receive a box, and even more happy to open boots for Mommy...

This is the gift I have in Lydia!

When she found out the boots were hers, she was happy as well...

She put them on right away....

The following day she woke and immediately placed them on her feet...only after she placed her new socks from Aunt Sunny on! She also walked around with her new hot cocoa pajama bottoms on her head, giggling and claiming, "I am a lion!"

Daddy loves his little girl!

We tried so hard to call Grandma Fultz with our face time feature...but had no luck...

So we face timed Daddy instead!

He was a good sport!

When I laid her down to bed, she whimpered. I told her "It was such a good day honey!" She said, "It was a good day to call Grandma Mommy." (She wanted to see Grandma so bad.) Every time I told her Happy Birthday, she would repeat, "Happy Birf-day Mommy. I love you so much!"

We are so blessed to have Miss Lydia in out lives!

Maya's yearly VCUG

2012-01-19T23:29:00.000-06:00

My poor baby woke on a chilly Wednesday morning, confused as to why she was only able to drink juice...no milk, no food, just juice. She cried and cried, and there was nothing I could do to explain her pretty little tears away. I held her and prayed for time to pass a little more quickly...

Over a year ago, we found out that Maya has urinary reflux into her kidney; this problem causes her to be on antibiotics every day to prevent an infection of her urinary tract or kidney. 1 in every 100 children are born with this problem...the good thing is that most children grow out of it and are able to stop antibiotics and never face the question of surgery to save their kidneys as they get older.

The bad thing...some children do not grow out of it and must stay on top of the problem diligently in order to save their kidneys.

Maya's first VCUG was when she was 7 months old.

Now, she is 18 months old, and that gave her a ticket to conscious sedation to ease to discomfort and memory of the procedure.

Daddy held his baby girl before while she received her nasal Versed.

She became pretty loopy within minutes...comfortable enough to watch the bubbles that Miss Lydia and I blew as they inserted a catheter for the procedure. She sucked on a sucker the whole time and nearly chocked from the saliva building in her mouth.

The procedure took about 20 minutes, and I held her tight on the way to the car. She flopped her head back, laughing all the while...still loopy from the versed. Within an hour she started to get cranky...and as I very well see in the PICU with my little patients, the meds became annoying to her. When we got home, she couldn't walk or even sit unassisted in the bath tub. Every time Daddy's arm let her go, her little body slid into the water like she was lathered with oil. She slept with me for 3 hours, it was heaven!

Unfortunately, Maya's reflux is still there...same as it was. We are praying that next year the problem will have corrected itself. For now, we have a good doctor treating her, and we are loving every little piece of our sweet Maya Ruth!

30 Years For Daddy!

2012-01-19T23:04:00.002-06:00

Daddy dear turned 30 a week and a half ago. I worked Friday night but set out to make it such a special weekend for him...and you can see how we all joined in on making it a year to remember!

The kids loved the icing...all 3 different flavors we used on his cake!

They literally all joined in and made it a challenging cake to complete! They were so thrilled be helping me and learning math concepts as we cooked! It was fun!

And there comes a point when you throw your hands in the air and say, "Have at it!"

On Saturday morning, I was driving home from work and had the grand idea to make it a Birthday weekend, not just a day! So, I stoped at Steve's favorite donut shop, picked up the donuts, and texted him a quick note to let him know that this was the beginning of his Birthday weekend!

Aiden got to work making him a crown..."fit for a king", as he would later say.

We prepared the gifts and adorned them with 30 chocolate kisses! I think I ate half of them by the end of the weekend!

I actually tried to make his Birthday dreams come true and asked him to take the afternoon for himself on Saturday to go get his long awaited road bike. For years now, he has talked about cycling and buying one of those awesome sleek bikes....I made that happen! No better way to close the third decade and step into the 4th than with a bike that helps him achieve his goals!

On Sunday morning we dropped the kids off at church...

Yes, I said we dropped the kids off at church!!!

And I took Steve to PF Chang's for lunch!

Is that considered a sin??? :)

While there, we received our fortunes. He got August (my birth month), and I got Winter (his birth season). Can you say we're quite the match?

We had too much cake, and too many brownies...but the kids loved it!

Daddy got a couple new outfits...

Some new shoes....

And lots of love!

Happy Birthday Daddy...we all love you very much!

Dress Up The Baby!

2012-01-15T23:18:00.002-06:00

Maya has become a little mannequin in the home! The kids place clothes, hats, masks and purses on her....

and then they laugh hysterically!

Okay, we all laugh hysterically!

And then we sleep so peacefully!

Life is good!

Christmas Night!

2012-01-15T23:12:00.001-06:00

Christmas night brought with it a whole lot of cuddling and Lego making! Life doesn't get any better than this!

Christmas!

2012-01-15T22:36:00.000-06:00

Yes, we celebrated Christmas around here! We enjoyed the beauty and magic of the season...more than ever! Only days before Christmas the three was empty, the kids were wondering where their gifts would come from, and I was waiting on an amazon order that had a few gift for them. The amazon order fell through, but the Lord never does! Grandma and Grandpa Fultz sent out a package for the kids, we had a handful of clothes for them, and a dear friend from work (Amy) said Santa came to her house and said that there were a bunch of good kids this year...and he sent her on a delivery errand. Of course, Santa delivered gifts for our outstanding children, and Mimi and Papa had gift galore for them on Christmas afternoon!

Santa packed Shane's stocking full of goodies for Mommy and Daddy! Guess he missed the memo that we were competing in a weight loss challenge!

He left Lego sets for the boys and dolls for the girls!

Maya played peek-a-boo with Daddy on Christmas morning!

And the boys explored their gift from Santa, in awe!

Lydia loved Christmas this year. She actually found that one of her favorite Christmas activities was watching Caillou's Holiday Movie on Sprout. She memorized the lines, sang the songs, and begged for the movie on a daily basis. I gave in to her pleas because the songs and stories made me feel like a child again!

Santa delivered a smurfs village Lego set to Amy...the sweet lady from work!

Did you happen to notice Aiden's two front teeth? It was classic to have lost both front teeth only weeks from Christmas!

The boys were more than grateful for the clothes we got them! They have inherited their Daddy's love of clothes! As we walked through Kohl's only days after Christmas to do some Birthday shopping for Daddy, Connor laced his arm into mine (in true gentleman fashion) and said, "Mommy, thank you so much for the clothes you got me for Christmas!" My heart filled with happiness as he exemplified the sweet innocent understanding that he always does; it was hard to focus on necessities for Christmas, and push off wants for our children, but they appreciated it! My kids are angels!

Grandma and Grandpa Fultz got Maya a purse with accessories, and Lydia got a play computer...which Maya tried to continuously steal from her sister through the days following Christmas!

When Maya finally opened her gift from Santa, she was overcome with happiness! Her biggest smile came across her face when she found out that she received her little hearts desire...a baby doll! She even looked back at her Daddy to confirm her joy!

He wasn't able to get the doll out fast enough for her liking!

Lydia loved her doll as well!

Lydia opened her clothes and came running to me with each item in her hand, exclaiming, "Look at all my cute clothes!"

They put their beautiful Christmas outfits on from Mimi and we visited my parents house for the afternoon!

Children make Christmas so fun!!! I love the excitement they bring into the day; I love my children, and I love Christmas so much!

I Can Do It!!!

2012-01-06T11:06:00.000-06:00

Miss Lydia is at the stage of doing things all on her own...for her self confidence and self worth. I try as hard as I can to exercise patience in allowing her to function independently. Most days she wanders around with shoes on the wrong feet; I wouldn't have it any other way!

The Way We Walk!

2012-01-05T21:08:00.000-06:00

My girls bring me so much joy. Yes, they are very challenging in their attachment to me as I face the battle so many women nowadays face with living a home life and a work life, but the thought of not having that adoration wold tear me apart. We spend many days in the car...driving from one place to the next.

As you can see, my typical outfit consist of exercise attire...you never know when you'll get a little run in. Heck, I even pack the jogger in the car...just in case my girls will let me run with them at the park; 9 times out of 10, they don't, but I can dream! I love holding Maya's hand and teaching her the right ways to walk in life (just wish I was always the BEST teacher at that.)! Nevertheless, I know that I do not always walk my BEST, but I try harder every day to be a better person, and I KNOW who can make up for my faults. That is truly living! I hope one day they understand that!

Lydia is gaining a great appreciation for fun, sun, and outside play!

I love when the photos shine light upon my children and make them glow like the true angels they are!

Sometimes Lydia tries to teach Maya the way to go...

And it's evident that pushing someone in the right direction never really works...

Eventually they will choose the way!

Priceless life lessons!

Gifts for Mommy!

2012-01-02T20:46:00.000-06:00

I stoped at my Mom's house before work this past Friday. I had a gift...a beautiful beaded lanyard...from her friend Renee. I LOVE PRETTY THINGS!

I think these count as pretty! I LOVE PRETTY SHOES!!!

Boys will be Boys....

2012-01-01T20:52:00.000-06:00

New Year's Eve must've been a blast for my boys! I walked in from work and found Aiden and Connor asleep on the couch! I was told they stayed up later than Daddy..past midnight!

And Daddy was in bed...covered with my snuggie!

The girls you ask?

Well, they were waiting for me to walk in the door so I could make them breakfast, dress them for church, and tend to their every little need! Yes, the life of night shift work is

one.

exhausting.

adventure.

It was our first Sunday with 11am church...and we were late!

Gifts...

2011-12-31T20:26:00.000-06:00

In an effort to get out and make it a special Visiting Teaching for December, I put my skills to work and made quilted blocks, framed with the quote, "Unto us, a Child is born" inside. I hope it will be treasured by the sisters who received them!

In the process, I decided to take pics of a few of the boys Thanksgiving projects...and then i tossed the projects in an effort to de-clutter!

A few of her favorite Christmas gifts!

2011-12-30T20:42:00.000-06:00

Little Maya loves the Monkey hat she received from her Mimi for Christmas!

She also happens to adore the portable tea set "Santa" brought to work. Actually, I have a very sweet friend at work who said Santa made his way to her house and claimed that there were some really good kids she had to bring some toys to. The girls received a tea set to share--Maya has claimed it as hers! She dumps all of HER treasures into the cart and pushes it all over the house!

Baby Shane, Our Boy!

2011-12-03T00:35:00.001-06:00

(Will update with pictures...they are priceless)
Beautiful Baby Shane--

The day started familiar...routines to accomplish, children to tame, and a house full of work ahead. Daddy arranged to be home most of the day; that turned ordinary as well, with errands to run, tantrums to calm, and tasks to accomplish. Yet, there was a certain calm in the air....a certain peace, and a sense of hope.

We scurried away from Target with the girls to pick the boys up at the bus stop. Mind you, at Target you would have laughed at your youngest sister giving everyone a smile. She has lost her voice, and squeaks sweet sentiments through her pudgy pouty lips. Though she is sick, she sounds as delicate and beautiful as ever. To calm her weary cries, I opened a package of oreos and allowed her to taste of its goodness. She reminded me of the goodness as well as she placed each chocolate wafer into my mouth after she had devoured the cream; I then received a sweet chocolaty kiss as a token of gratitude. Daddy roamed the isles and Maya stayed attached to my hip while Lydia placed her curious to be three year old hands on every item. Soon enough Maya wanted down to fall into her sisters footsteps; and she most certainly did. Lydia tripped and fell, slicing her tiny finger, while Maya stoped people in their tracks. They admired her oreo smitten face, her sweet strawberry blond pigtails, and her "doll like" countenance, as was uttered from strangers lips. You would have smiled at their sweetness.

You would have looked on with joy as we drove home and witnessed the pure, lovely, and gentle snow fall down. In the three o clock hour, snow began to fall...I am certain you would have loved to see our joy, and even more so, feel our peace.

You would have laughed as Lydia looked out the window at the snow as we drove through town. You would've encouraged her insisting behavior of rolling the windows down to be just one layer closer to the beautiful flakes.

Then...you would have stood in awe as Maya...stood in awe. Little, voiceless, Maya stood still as can be for minutes as she admired the falling snow. She stared at our hair, opened her mouth in mimic of Mommy and Daddy, and shivered her little body away...yet, begged to stay outside.

A grin would have crossed you face as I opened the front door to an arrangement of daisies and blue carnations. You would have chuckled as the delivery man said, "Robing Johnson?" to which I said, "Umm....no!" He looked down in confusion, fumbled his papers, and said, "Well is must be Steve and Crystal!"

When the boys got home, you would have been so proud of Beautiful Connor, and his "big boy" way of helping Daddy set up the Christmas tree. Perhaps you would have felt the strings of my heart pull as I tried to find a "big boy" task for Aiden to accomplish, knowing very well that the look on his face was a clear signal that he was not fond of Connor's "big boy" duties making him look small. You would have been proud as I claimed that Aiden could be a "big boy" and decorate the tree ALONE!!!

More giggles would have come if you could have seen the look on Lydia's face, and the tears she cried when she couldn't be just one arm stretch closer to your cake....and then the tears Connor cried when Lydia touched his slice of cake...his slice to be, that is!

The ultimate laugh would have been enjoyed as Aiden climbed on the top bunk of the beds and crept along, quiet as can be while I tucked fresh sheets and blankets into the bottom bunk. He was Santa, red hat and all. He asked me to pretend I didn't see him, and then started in a medley of Christmas stories. He said, "Then what to my wandering eyes should appear...." (long pause) "...a mouse..." Huh??? Connor quickly corrected him, "Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse!" Aiden took the sweet correction well, and simply recited the correct Christmas poem.

You would have delightfully given your orange hot chocolate to your brothers, seeing they were thrilled with the "orangeness" and whipped cream Daddy topped it with.

Finally, at the end of the day, when every soul but mine slept peacefully, you would have wiped the tears off my face as I finished watching the last scenes in a movie...chosen only because it seemed to be the only good thing on TV. The mother held up her hands and gracefully, quietly, said, "I give my son to you...he is yours".

At eight, Connor knows more than anyone else...but doesn't realize it quite yet.
At six, Aiden is full of knowledge and fun...all scrambled in a soup of pure happiness and joy for life.
At two, turning three, Lydia is independent, full of energy, and loving her girlhood.
At one, Maya is beautiful, sweet, attached, and everything parents love and adore.

And you, dear Shane...I long to call you five. I know I will someday. We celebrated you and the five years you have graced our family today. I'd say,"If you could have seen it, you would have loved it...." but dear child, "I know you saw it...I know you loved it!"

To my dear baby boy...to our dear baby boy....Happy Birthday!

From a family who loves you and anticipates your sweet gentle touch, your tender little coos, and your graceful growing body more than you can possibly fathom....

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!
Mommy

Prayers

2011-12-01T22:06:00.001-06:00

My sweet Aiden prayed tonight:

Heavenly Father,
Please bless that Aunt Sunny's roof will not fly off.
And if it does fly off, please bless that she will be safe in her car!

Connor prayed:

Heavenly Father,
Please help Aunt Sunny find a way to fix her roof!

I have the best of both perspectives in my home. We are always trying to protect ourselves in life...our spirits, that it.

But when we fail to do so ourselves, it is a neat thing to know how to fix the problem huh?

Thank you for the life lessons sweet boys! You are the best!

By the way, the winds are brutal in NM tonight...we started the day with a clean landscaped back yard and are ending the day with mounds of tumble weeds. Ugh!

Teeth, Falls, and Fevers

2011-11-30T20:36:00.001-06:00

It's the end of the day...

That doesn't mean the day is over!!!

I find myself, as a mother of many young children, making every moment of my day BUSY! Seems that to do all the maintaining, the occasional deep cleaning, and organizing that a big family requires, most every moment must be utilized.

So, tonight my options were:

1. put the kids to bed and fold the REST of the laundry (that I've been working all week on)

2. put the kids to bed and exercise (which i have been lacking with like crazy this week)

3. put the kids to bed and just sit here, risking an early bed time (which I need so very bad)

4. put the kids to bed and catch up on the blogging

Option 4, obviously...and Lydia joined me on the couch just moments after I sat down.

Aiden lost his second front tooth on Monday...the first was lost on Thanksgiving! He looks and sound just adorable! He also flew out of a moving car this evening! Yep, that would be A.I.D.E.N. I screamed in horror as his body tumbled out of the car as I was pulling into the driveway. He was being a boy...the crazy one he can sometimes be...already unbuckled, already opening the door. He pretty much flew out--it was a sad site.

Maya is growing up so fast. Her hair is getting longer, and her features are getting more beautiful daily! I love this little gal!

Lydia has been sick as ever. She started running fevers a good 48 hours ago...right as I got off of my Thanksgiving and weekend full of night shifts. We were up ALL night long last night...finally dozing off at 5am...to wake at 7am for school routines. We missed the bus, came home from our drive to the school, cleaned up and took a nap....all of us. Upon waking we went straight the the Peds urgent care where she was diagnosed with croup and a possible bacterial infection (signaled by the high fevers). She sounds like a seal, barking the day and night away.

She is eating plenty of ice cream and popsicles. She can hardly keep her eyes open in the day, and when the night hits...she can't stop coughing, and therefore, cannot sleep!

Here's to a fast recovery little Miss Lydia!

Connor is keeping his distance...his desire to stay healthy keeps him away from others, washing his hands and sitting on the floors...away from the bugs spread on the couches from sick bodies laying around all day long. He almost inevitably gets sick each and every time....

The pic above was on Thanksgiving, right before I headed into work for the night...that post is to come!

A Little Bit of This!

2011-11-22T22:00:00.000-06:00

Miss Lydia:

She's the bravest little gal I have yet to meet. She even picked up this "bug" one morning before anyone but she and I were awake, starting the laundry, packinglunches, and planning out our crazy day. In her hands was the result of her "catch"; since I was too busy to catch it, I just listened from afar as she said, "Mommy, there's a bug. That's okay, I will get it!" I convinced her to save it for the boys to see...I think they would like to have this particular "bug"!

The neighbors caught up with us and sold us their tiny bike, outgrown, for a small price, and now my Lydia is riding a bike on her own! She is catching on so well! I was told that the streamers were taken off of the new bike and so graciously given to Lydia...she loves them!!!

And as always, she resembles me more and more every single day!

Miss Maya:

This little princess is growing up so fast. She walks around the house answering, "Ya!" to all the little questions thrown her way.

"Maya, do you want to eat?"...."Ya"

"Maya, do you want to go for a run?"..."Ya"

"Maya, do you want hot cocoa?"...."Ya"

Speaking of hot cocoa...her "H" sounds like she would be a good french woman as hacks out her words with a flemmy accent in the back of her throat.

Beautiful Connor and his Daddy:

I am so proud of this little...big...guy! He just earned his Bob Cat award in scouts this past week. He pinned the token of his reward onto me, as I have won a prize too, and gladly accepted his patch that will be sewn to a uniform once that uniform is his! He and his Daddy worked on the rocket derby together resulting in a pretty awesome creation!

I love scouts! I find myself saying, "DO YOUR BEST!" to my boys constantly!

This is Connor and his scouts leader...Tammy!

Angel Aiden:

Now, you can see why and how he lives up to his sweet name! Aiden made me a heart out of his pop tart the other day after school!

I LOVE THIS ANGEL!

As for me...I'm busy making motivational winter running pieces! This has pulled me through some chilly mornings out here! I can even throw it on and hide the bad bed hair! Love it!

Today...and a few weeks back!

2011-11-03T23:40:00.000-05:00

By far, one of my favorite moments of the day was:

Laying on the floor with my beautiful girls.

Well, I was laying here doing my exercise video, and with every transition they were up and down with me.

First, there was "JUMP!" out of sweet Maya's mouth...as she expected us to be jumping all over the house, like flying lunatics, mocking the flying lunatics on the TV! This is pure, simple, and worth the effort entertainment for little ones!

Then, as we went to the floor for the ab routines, they layed beside me; Lydia's little body was smashed parallel to mine while Maya's tiny head crammed itself against mine...crown to crown. Their heels faced the ceiling, as did mine, and my body was barely movable because of my two sweet girls who follow my every footstep and repeat my every word.

The power of a parent!

A few weeks back, we enjoyed a day at the aquarium!

The day measured up to great FUN...and so did WE!

Looking good and strong Aiden!

Such a typical girl Miss Lydia...trying to increase your height with those little tip toes!

Connor, you're getting too tall for the stick!

Mommy...just inches higher than Connor! Oh dear!

Add caption

Daddy, too tall and cool!

Miss Maya, fighting the reality...yes dear, you are short!

My hubby told me I looked like a little girl all day. That couldn't be because of the back pack? Or the leggings? Or the hair? HA! I've learned that my nice leather purse was being ruined quickly so I now carry a tinker bell bag around everywhere!

Daddy fulfilled his duties well...so long as Maya allowed him to.

We found the queen ant!

And Lydia taught the queen just what real queens do all day long! Yes, we love to talk!

Halloween Success!

2011-11-02T11:55:00.001-05:00

Halloween was a blast in our house! Lydia wanted to be Tinker bell, but when she saw Maya was wearing Aiden's monkey costume from 5 years ago (sniff, sniff), she decided to wear Connor's lion costume from...5 years ago (sniff, sniff). They couldn't be better matched personality wise. I often hear Maya saying, "I wan A-en" and then Lydia follows with "I wan Connor" on a daily basis.

I wasn't allowed to get solo pictures of Maya...

We were greeted with the sweet presence of Minnie Mouse in her pretty puffy lace!

And Rapunzel took her thrown with her long luscious locks!

Vampire #1 scared us silly!

And Vampire #2 gave us a fright! (Their pics got twisted and turned around...oops!)

The fairy with lost wings, couldn't fly high enough for her her screaming monkey!

But he calmed in time!

We played games--toss the scarecrow, in which the person with the scarecrow in the end was the ultimate LOSER! But don't mind our TRICK, the LOSER got a TREAT! The babes bounced their bodies to Taylor Swift's "You belong with me!" as the scarecrow flew, flopped, and then fell stagnant in Maya's and Hallie's hands!

We searched for "CLUE'S" which led to a hidden treat! CLUES: stripes, flowers, pretty, homemade, has hand-L's, screams "hold me", and contains your treat. I guess I thought the kids could think a little more abstract at this age, but they couldn't....yet, Connor still found the treat in a homemade hand bag. He thought it was awesome that I made 7 clues, and we have 7 people in our family! WOW...he can find symbolism where it was never meant to be!

Talk about last minute Halloween success! The kids closed the afternoon with Halloween cartoons, a cupcake, and then off to a night of more Halloween fun! I took the boys and Lydia out for an hour and a half of trick or treating and was pleased when a teenage boy stoped to help Aiden pick up all of his dropped candy! What a pleasant Halloween we enjoyed! I received dozens of Thanks You's from my sweet boys all night long!

Glimpse of Heaven

2011-10-23T16:40:00.002-05:00

I spent a few of little Jude Matthew's 67 days caring for him in the PICU. There was a spirit, recognizable to my heart, every time I walked by his room or was in his and his dear parent's presence. Jude spent his final hours in his Mom and Dad's arms on Saturday, but lives on for eternity for and with them. It is such a humbling gift to be able to share of such limited time with firm and beautiful children of our Father. Every time I walked in to Jude's room, I was graced with Mandy praying over him in such purity....for him and other's in the rooms surrounding Jude....or I would see a new beautiful arrangement of cards, window decals, and scriptures (as seen below). They lived every day of his 67 days fighting for him in the simplest and purest ways they could--prayer, scripture study, and lots of love.

Guess what? They have him!

By such small and simple means, we shall all have our families for eternity!
Mandy and Brandon Pelton, thank you for sharing your son!

Prince Charming

2011-10-15T12:20:00.002-05:00

No better way to spend Saturday morning; I watched Connor become a Prince to his Miss Lydia!

Here she is...waiting....waiting...waiting!

He comes in for the scoop....

Stabilizes his stance as she grabs on for dear life...

And voila...we have one happy couple! I love these two!

Fall Mornings!

2011-10-13T09:41:00.003-05:00

Lately, some of my favorite moments with these kids are our long walks to the bus stop. The weather is colder, and it often takes a great deal of effort and courage to brave the 30-40 degree chill with all four kids. This week has been one of Ford utilization...Mom is sick, but last week we walked often! Usually, the boys hop onto their bikes, the girls get tucked into the jogger, surrounded by blankets, and we take off for a morning run/ride. Connor's bike, however, has a mind of it's own and will not cooperate with us...the tires are an endless money pit. So....until Daddy has some time to fix them, we are left to walk everywhere.

I encouraged the boys a few mornings to make the morning trek with donuts and hot cocoa! They loved it! Half way through the walk, Connor complained of tummy cramps because we were walking too fast!

The girls get their fair share of running too!

And the joy on their faces is priceless...but the scream of terror is excruciating once I gather them back into the jogger. Oh well! There cannot be joy without sorrow, right?

Family Fun That Pays!

2011-10-10T20:26:00.000-05:00

So we noticed there was snow on the Sandia Mountains on Saturday after our heavy couple days of rain in the valley. It had dropped into the low 30's on Friday night into Saturday morning and even left me surprised with some ice on the car windshield as I was rushing out of the house to get to the church.

When I got home, we made our way to the mountains to enjoy the beauty of the first snow. Everything looks more beautiful in white, even mother earth. We sang primary songs and laughed at the kids and their sweet innocence.

Up and up, round and round, back and forth we climbed the mountain.

The sun was shining on our fun family adventure. It was a perfect day to enjoy such beauty. The best part of all, it was free! Just kidding. The best part of all was being together as a family hoping to create memories that last.

Even our beautiful Princesa was smiling and laughing, not that its hard to catch her doing that.

See!

Now this guy had the right idea...yeah right! It was flippin cold up there. He must have been a super hero. That is quite a monster climb.

Little Miss Lydia was enjoying every minute of the ride up the mountain. She had her window down like daddy and refused to close it even at the pleas of her two older brothers in the back who were the lucky recipients of all that cold air.

I'm pretty sure the thermometer was dropping a degree for every minute we climbed up that road. When we got to the peak it was reading 27 degrees. It was quite a drastic change in temperature from our little valley home we left behind about an hour earlier.

The boys were in heaven the minute they jumped out of the car. They are standing in a stream of water from the snow melt off. They don't seem to mind a bit. That will change in a bit when they start to freeze to death, or so it would seem from the complaining.

What a beautiful view over the crest...there are no railings here and it is a complete drop off. We moved away from that spot quickly and went to the more tourist friendly spot.

Lydia refused to let anyone sit with her to take a picture. She got up before too long once her butt froze to death.

Mommy and Maya are loving it!

Notice the bald head. I just shaved my head the day before. Perfect timing! It was worth every minute though. However, in the back of my mind was my concern for a helpless victim of the snow who's tires I could hear spinning in the snow down below. On our way back down the trail I realized I needed to go check on them.

After trying to push them out with a couple of other guys, which failed miserably, I decided to risk our own freedom and back down to our grateful sojourners and tow them out. We found success and our new friends would not allow us to leave without taking some money for our time. I really wanted nothing in return, but the feeling of doing good. Nothing beats that feeling of the spirit confirming making a good choice.

After towing out the stuck Jeep with our Ford Explorer (just sayin), we headed down the mountain and made it home just in time to see the sun setting in the west.

The girls got a quick bath.

And Maya apparently didn't get enough to drink throughout the day. Whatever!

So, we ended out Family Fun Day with more money than we set out with. The only thing that beats free, is getting paid to have fun! But that is not the point here. I hope that our adventure not only increased our cash on hand for a short time but increased our family's ability to stay together. I hope it pays dividends in our children's future. I hope that adventures like these will help us to weather the storms of life. It is important to laugh, smile, and play together. I pray that we can make trips like this a priority and that it will continue to pay into the eternities with our children and family in general, doing what's right. I want our children to know that they can talk to us and that we can have fun together. We can be friends, but we are there parents and sometimes we have to enforce the "laws". I am so grateful for moments like this though when we can escape and leave all of the worries behind. I am grateful to my Heavenly Father for granting me moments like this to hold onto when times are hard; to remember how much we are loved as His children. So everyone get out there and have some fun. Enjoy the beauty of the Earth and who knows...you may come back with more than you left with (in many ways)!!!

Beautiful Connor at Eight!

2011-09-30T20:41:00.006-05:00

Saturday September 24, 2011 was Connor's very special day! In this picture below, he was hiding the tattoo he stuck on himself that morning while he built a fire truck with Grandpa and Aiden at the local Lowes!

Grandma and Grandpa Fultz

Mimi and Connor!

Bishop Greenwood and Connor!

Bishop Greenwood and Aiden!

Years ago...12 to be exact...I never imagined the day I would see my oldest child fall into the waters of baptism. I always dreamed of being a mother, capable of teaching my children truths of their Lord, Jesus Christ; leading them into paths of righteousness in similitude of the One True Source. Connor is BEAUTIFUL, I have called him Beautiful Connor from day one. Each of my children have personal songs from me...little nursery lullabies designed to fit their innate personalities, and Connor's starts with that, "Beautiful Connor....Mommy does love you!"

We took this picture on our way to the chapel, right before he was changed into his pearly whites! He stands below with his Daddy; they are both so very handsome!

Grandpa and Grandma Fultz gave talks on Baptism and the Holy Ghost, and he was given a personalized set of scriptures from them as well. We sang, I love to see the Temple(his favorite song), Baptism, and When I am Baptized.

Do you see what I mean??? BEAUTIFUL CONNOR!!!

The baptism was sandwiched between many RS Conference meeting in the ward building. It was small in number; but all those in attendance were so important to us. Connor was so very proud as he stood with his sweet grin for pictures with his Daddy. He held my hand as we listened to the talks, and when the baptism was over and I was helping him change into his charming new suit, I asked him, "How do you feel Connor?" He smiled and said, "That was easy!" Dear boy...you are a chosen son of God; I love you so very much!

Aiden showed his true colors following the big event!

Mommy and Connor!

Grandpa and Grandma Fultz who traveled from lovely PA for Connor!

The boys...with Aiden to remind them that they will ALWAYS be BOYS! That's a good thing!

The girls...looking pure and pretty in such pretty whites!

Miss Lydia...you're even adorable with fingers smashing your nose!

And the food!!!! The donuts were intended to create the number 8...the sprinkle ones!

I made Connor a beautiful heirloom...hand-stitched...quilt. The border of clothes are all items from his baby and toddler years. There are outfits he wore when we lived in Logan UT..."Go Aggies", and then items I remember placing on his little body over and over again because they were my favorite. I could go through each one and explain the significance, I will with Connor someday! The outfit appliqued on was the one we took him home from the hospital in.

After thousands of stitches, over 40 hours of work, bleeding fingers, 2 weeks of late LATE nights, and lots of "Oops" and "Dang-its", I was able to present the quilt to Connor. How fitting, these years have been filled with all those thing I just mentioned--thousands of stitches, weaving his personal life experiences together, bleeding elbows hands and knees, late nights, and many "Oops" and "Dang-its" at the close of the day, coming from mine and Daddy's mouths. He had prayed one night as I was about to sit to work on it, "Please bless Mommy to finish her quilt", and when he found out that it was his on Saturday September 24th, his eyes grew wide, a little nervous twitch was seen , and he hugged me so tight! He then went and told Aiden...which didn't go over well; Aiden's time will come!

Beautiful Connor received the Holy Ghost as well. He was told that he should always listen to his mother, that she will never lead him astray. How fitting, as I had presented Connor and Daddy with "Strippling Warrior" matching tie tacs to wear together on their special day. The Strippling Warriors stated, in their righteousness, "We do not doubt, our Mother's knew it". As a matter of fact, after Connor was baptized and dressed, we took our seats in the room and awaited Daddy's handsome arrival. When Daddy came in, he hugged Connor; Connor pulled out his tie, and in sweet innocence and excitement looked his Daddy in the eye and said, "I'm wearing mine Daddy!" Daddy quickly pulled his out and pinned it to his tie to match his sweet pure son.

Crazy Times...

2011-09-16T17:30:00.004-05:00

Can you tell what I have been teaching these kids to do...all by example, the best teacher life can offer! I finished my run with my sister this morning...we stood and talked for a good 5 minutes before she turned and headed home, and then felt like letting Miss Lydia enjoy the morning. She decided with her own sweet will and stated it to me ever so kindly..."I wan run wif you Mommy!" She pushed the jogger and ran 1/4 mile home. I love to make every minute of my morning run worth something, but this morning I let go and let her love her 1/4 mile; I guess you can say it was worth more than gold in the end!

See what I mean? More than gold!

Thursday night, I must have said a hundred times over, "DO YOUR HOMEWORK!"

I swore something terribly addicting had been sprinkled in the kids food as, one by one, they all turned into laughing lunatics...accomplishing everything, but their homework. I tried placing one in the bedroom and the other at the kitchen table, but Miss Lydia made her way into the bedroom and encouraged the lunatic regimen, worsening the scenario every passing moment. She sat behind Connor, pulling him back by his shirt collar, invoking the hyena laugh that I simple adore from the depths of his belly. I sat back in the corner of the kitchen, giggling silently, so as to maintain my parental role.

The homework was NOT GETTING DONE!

Moments later, Connor broke into a self made tune, singing a two word song at the top of his lungs, "Teddy bear....teeeeedyyyy beeear!"

I decided to switch my agenda from homework to showers. I told Aiden, "Shower...NOW!"; ten times later, the same words were escaping my mouth. Aiden stood at the bathroom door, behind a two inch opening with a conniving grin. I shouted, "Do...(long pause as I gather my thoughts)... (oh yes, here it is)...what I tell you to do!" HA...how's that for saving myself? Aiden giggled, sending me into laughter, as he said, "Do...your homework?" I guess you can't out wit a 6 year old...when you're a Mom of many children, they all have combination names, such as ConAiden, and your sentences no longer make sense...

And last, but not least, I did have a Birthday a while back. My Mom recently took me to Old town to celebrate; I captured Miss Lydia chasing a bird there!

We ate YUMMY food!

And laughed hysterically at the October "2th" rosary rally!

Steve spoiled me rotten that day!

I spent a Birthday lunch with my Sister, Cara (a good friend) and all the kiddos! My niece desperately wanted to be my child that day! :)

And experimented with a new make-up look! I know, I'm a dork...but it's fun!

Moving and School!

2011-08-23T22:44:00.004-05:00

The girls and I have been a bit fatigued lately; moving day--or week--came and went only one short week ago. The girls have learned how to hide in little corners of large spacious cabinets, only to have their child like mansion invaded by pots, pans, cereal, and noodles. Nevertheless, they always find a way to clear their tiny dens for some cozy sitting room, leaving me even more fatigued than they look below. My Lydia has decided that naps are overrated--following the steps of her brothers who both decided that shortly after the age of two, they were "grown-up" and in spite of tantrums and fits, her desire, stated plainly as "I wanna' say up" far exceeds her need to rest her little mind and body. I do not fight her...I simply find that a routine car ride will give her just enough of a break from this chaotic life to deal with another few hours before her long break ensues with night fall.

Maya, my growing baby, loves to nap...

Momma' loves Maya!!!

The first two things we focused on upon moving in were

1. Hanging our favorite painting...always a #1 in our opinion

and

2. Getting the kitchen in working order. So far, over the last week we have had take out pizza, chicken nuggets and fries (with our treasured smurf toys!), Sonic soft drinks, slushes, grilled cheese and corn dogs, and movie theater popcorn. You might say the working kitchen has been worthless for us, but we indeed have baked cake and brownies!!! I am now of the mind that a family in transition with a major move and lots of little kids is a family in need of meals...I will remember this the next time I hear of a family moving.

But it's a lovely kitchen, I'd say! It took a day and a half to unpack and get it in order...that is record timing for me!

The move looked kinda like this from my view every day on moving week--two to three times a day! Steve and I took a great deal of work on our own shoulders in order to lessen the load on the Elder's Quorum who met us on Saturday. I was delightfully pleased when one man from our ward thanked me for having been so prepared with this move. He claimed it was the best move he has seen yet with how prepared we were...how ready we were. I felt relief as I heard those kind words...knowing that our hard work day after day after day was recognized.

I was proud to see the young fella's working so hard...and having fun while at it!

And wouldn't ya' know...the first day of school was the second day of moving week! But...for the first time in my children's schooling years, they attended the FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL!!! I nearly cried as I brought them into the classroom. My heart was sad to see them go, but my tears were falling because my sleep deprived Lydia stood in Aiden's classroom screaming at the top of her squealish lungs because, for some odd reason, she felt like she was being left at school. The teacher looked at me in concern as I tried to hug my Angel Aiden goodbye. He was frightened; he looked at me, his eyes grew wide in fear as his arms laid at his body's side and his hands drew their palms forward--tears swelled up in his big blue eyes as he said, "What do I do Mom?" I looked to the teacher for direction and could only hug him and tell him to follow his teacher's lead.

Connor, this year, was confident as ever. He has a fabulous teacher who seems to have an enthusiasm for teaching. I went to the Open House on the second night of school. I raced my boys down the side walk...passing every parent and child pair as we ran! It was so much fun; the boys begged me to stay at the school with them longer--to run and play!

Yes, dear Aiden begged me to take them to school on the first day...he was fearful of how to get to his classroom!

And on the second day, his same big blue eyes swelled with tears as he begged me to take him again. I reassured him that Connor would be with him and had Connor commit to walking Aiden to class. Connor, being the good boy he is, was happy to help his little brother!

And on the 8th day of school, Aiden was helping me unpack some boxes and ended up with another corneal abrasion; he has been home since...healing. For some reason, my baby's eyes are a major source of trial for him; perhaps he has eyes that can "see" and will see many great and marvelous things!

Lydia misses her brothers when they are gone. We allowed her to stay up late with them, playing in the boys bedroom tonight. She walked out, timid and sweet, with two built mini Lego people in her hands, stating, "I like to play!". Yes, little princess, you like to play, but you especially like to play with your brother's; I believe you will be very influential in their lives as they learn to respect and honor the girls in their lives....they love you so very much!

My baby is growing up! My short little Maya walked with me to the bus stop today, asserting her little feet every step of the way! This gal is a handful! Shew ate my deodorant tonight...and then vomited a mouthful only seconds after consuming it! Never a dull moment!

The Love of A Sister...and A Brother

2011-08-16T22:33:00.003-05:00

My children bring so much joy into my life...

The also are asking the gray hairs to come out!

Maya quickly found her way into every nook and corner of this house as soon as we moved in and started packing things away...

Then things slowly started coming out of the cabinets.

See, gray hairs.

I was asking the assistance of the kids this afternoon as I tried to organize and sort items in our sardine packed garage. These kids...every one of them, were put to work, and they loved it. They boys were red faced after their mile bike ride up the hill from the bus stop to our house. They kept their backpacks on as they admired the garage and all of their toys...semi organized, but ready for little hands to attack each piece, misplace the contents of the stuffed boxes and tubs, and find ways to place smiles on each little face as well.

They saw me fast at work, hauling items from the garage to the shed...in the back of the house. The boys quickly begged for a job...so i put them to work. Then Miss Lydia walked in her brother's footsteps, and screamed to have a job....so, again, I put her to work! The boys hauled paint buckets and tools to the shed while Miss Lydia had the privilege of taking sponges! She noticed her "light duty" was nothing compared to her brothers and thew down the sponges as she then grabbed the "grass catcher" from the lawn mower and walked three courageous steps and said, "Iss too heafy!" I laughed and told her to go get her sponges; she retrieved them and fulfilled her duties!

When I was walking around the house towards the back, I saw Connor and Miss Lydia turning the corner to come to the front of the house. Connor had his hand around Miss Lydia's shoulders and was bending down to give her a little kiss...on her binky! Lydia's face was so admiring and Connor's smile was so tender and loving. My heart witnessed such sweet sibling love.

Moments later My Maya walked around me...you see, she was in heaven freely roaming back and forth after her siblings, from the front, to the back...over and over. Mommy was allowing her to be free, and she showed her appreciation; I was bent over pulling a few small weeds I happened to notice on one of my trips to the front of the house. My Maya was sneaking up behind me when I noticed her tiny hand brushing my skin. She then came face to face with me and said, "Mmmmm....MA" which is what she says as she is about to kiss you, and I received a few sweet kisses before she walked away, happy as can be.

I'm thinking things are changing for the good...and everyone is feeling it!

Date Night!

2011-08-06T19:06:00.003-05:00

Steve and I were lucky enough to have a date...afternoon, not quite a date night. It was good. Though, like anything in our life, the plans didn't pan out the way we intended. You see, we had a scheduled afternoon to ride the rail runner up at 2:12pm, walk the streets downtown, catch a bite to eat, see the final Harry Potter movie, and wait at the train station while holding hands (had to add a little romance in) for the train which was to take us back to our destination at 6:45pm.

On the way to the train station, Mrs.Frugality here decided to ask her husband if he was interested in stopping for snacks at the gas station. Her husband said perhaps the grocery store would be okay...but no, they both decided the gas station would be a quick stop! Never go off course...it only ruins your "plans"! We stopped at the gas station, waited several minutes for the lone cashier to trouble shoot her prior customer, and then another 30 seconds for her to read the fine print of a coupon I presented to her (see Mrs.Frugality!), and then I said, "We're kinda in a hurry...". We purchased our items and quickly ran outside and into the car.

When we arrived at the train station, Steve pulled in front of the tracks...and barely parked the car off the tail end of the last rail. He asked...no, told...me to jump out and tell then to STOP. I got out and slowly began to sit back in the car as I heard the train's whistle sound it's final tune. We missed the train. Darn!

But we still had such a fun time...playing pac-man at the pizza restaurant we ended up at.

Taking goofy pics!

Laughing!

And, of course, posing for my star crossed lover! HA!

This came after a cute little pose I couldn't maintain for his slow moving fingers...there were too many eyes watching. Mrs. Frugality is also Mrs. Conservative!

When a House is a Home

2011-08-04T23:53:00.004-05:00

I consider the last 9 months of our life here in this home a blessing indeed. It has been intertwined with happiness and laughter, sorrow and disappointment, and even some pride with subsequent humility--all of the natural spiritual growth cycles we face in life.

We learned here that Miss Maya faces a childhood of daily antibiotics, that carrying water for a family of six is quite a process (for Mommy, that is), and that a kitchen will never be completely clean until the children are completely grown!

We found that warmth beside a fire place requires an aesthetically pleasing chair for Mommy and a cozy rocker for Daddy, and that fine art can say more than the picture itself when you dive into the emotions it instills in the owner or the hands which painted it's strokes.

We realized that happiness can begin anew each day by allowing "light" into the home--the light of the world, and the light of good righteous living!

We concluded that the boys are just fine in the smallest room of the house...the only care about having fun day...after day...after day!

And we learned that the girls NEED darkening shades to rest well. They also were given the biggest rooms of the house...one for each! They will be in for a small surprise next week!

We remembered how wonderful it is to walk into our spare bedroom (also Maya's room for a short while) and feel so close to our Baby Shane as we are wrapped in memories of him.

I am sad to be leaving, but excited to move into the next phase of life...in hopes that doors will be and remain open, hearts will stay soft and workable, and life will be a clean slate for memories to be made and dreams to come true.

Connor is 8!!!

2011-08-04T20:09:00.003-05:00

Well, I'm only a day shy of a month...but it's better late then never! Our Beautiful Connor turned eight on July 5th. He has looked forward to this Birthday for years--first, because he will be baptized this year, and second, because it's the year that Cars 2 would be released!

We asked him where he wanted to eat, and he said, Applebees; of course, anyone who knows Connor well understands the deep meaning behind choosing Applebees for a Birthday meal.

Daddy did some last minute Birthday shopping while we waited in the car...

And then we had a very quiet celebration at home...in honor of sweet Connor!

Connor reminds me of a stripling warrior...always has. He is humble, kind, true, compassionate, and so very loving. It is my prayer that he uses this year to dive into righteousness...to truly make choices that will bring happiness to him and his Father in Heaven.

We love you Connor Dude!

Life Saving Secrets

2011-08-02T08:53:00.003-05:00

It is clear as day that goldfish are a morning staple in the house when:

Your 14 month old daughter seems to find her "goldfish" cup (the one we take in the jogger every morning) and brings it to you, begging with an "uh-uh-uhhh", for it to be filled with the giant box of extra cheddar goldfish on the kitchen counter.

The girls DO eat breakfast every morning...but I would be lying if I said it wasn't preceded, or followed, by a large cup of goldfish and some ice cold water. For Mothers curious of some life saving secrets--this is the only way I get the girls to peacefully survive our morning runs in the jogger! I'd be lying again if I said I didn't eat a handful myself...every morning!

Lydia and Jesus...More Ordinary than not!

2011-08-01T09:28:00.000-05:00

My Little Lydia walked with me in the bedroom the other day as I sang this beautiful song at the top of my lungs. I have been caught doing this...you can go HERE for an example of my silly singing stories. On this day , however, it was just me and Lydia. Recently having learned every line and transition of this soul searing song, I sang with my heart. Lydia walked nearby, in my high heels, and said, "Jesus, yes Jesus...do you want to walk? Do you want to exercise? (as she tried to manipulate her little body in high heels up onto the elliptical) Yes, Jesus!" I have never heard her speak with Jesus in play...outside of prayer. It was special. I am convinced that as we DO what is right, in word and deed, and as we emulate who the Savior is in our very countenance, we can better "walk" with the Savior and prepare our children to do so as well.

Gardener

2011-07-28T21:04:00.005-05:00

It is a funny thing--how the Lord speaks to us. He usually uses common themes in my life, metaphors, symbolic references--all of which strike me in the very center of my tender heart. Often, I sit back and marvel at how particular He is in sending these themes in my life in the moments I need them, or in the moments I can relate them to another (who may need them as well). One of these themes is that of a Gardener.

Most people whom I love deeply, who love me deeply, or who change my life for the better, have revolved around this theme of being or becoming a Gardener. One of my husbands favorite talks is that by Hugh B. Brown, "God is the Gardener". My husband has always loved that theme, of God and the Gardener.

So on with the Lord and His Hand:

My Mother has been a unique Gardener in my life. Years ago, for her 50th Birthday, my sisters and I produced gifts for her from our own hands--a quilt with beautiful flowers appliqued on it, a pillow with the words "Gardener" upon it, and a poem from me, titled Gardener. I found it recently:

Infant seeds

Weathered hands,

Press firmly in the ground.

Tend to them, wise Gardener,

Tend to your sweet

Infant seeds,

Weathered hands,

They water and they prune.

Pleading for some light

To fall upon your little babes

Piercing ground

Inching up

Toward weathered hands for care.

Protected in the shadow

Of the wise strong

Gardener,

Reaching down

To nourish and to love.

Struggling to keep them safe,

To give them place for growth.

In full bloom

Flowers bright--

The fruit of your dear work;

To plant, nourish, tend, and care

For your little

Infant seeds

Weathered hands--

Great honor goes to them.

Though pierced and trodden by the world

They've nourished little babes.

My dear mother...a Gardener in my life, as most good mother's are to their children...is a beautiful keeper of her "garden". As I read through those words I find myself in awe over how I am becoming that very thing to my own children as well.

I watched Steve in the yard, doing his gardening tasks. He is as natural as it gets when it comes to being outside and working with his hands; it is a beautiful thing to me.

I thought of everything we have been through and couldn't help but be drawn to that one talk by Hugh B. Brown...he talks about God as the Gardener in such a profound and beautiful way:

"Some of you, as you go forward, are going to meet with disappointment, will have many disappointment, some of them crucial. Sometimes you will wonder whether He has forgotten you. Sometimes you will even wonder if He lives.... But in these times, when so many say God is dead, where so many are denying His existence, I think I cannot leave with you a better message than this; God is aware of you individually--He knows who you are and what you are, and furthermore, He knows what you are capable of becoming. Be not discouraged then, if you do not get all the things you want, just when you want them. Have the courage to go on and face your life, and if necessary, reverse it to bring it into harmony with His law. (Hugh B. Brown then goes on to speak of a currant bush and symbolically relate a theme of adversity in life) As I looked at this currant bush, the clumps, there seemed to be a tear on each one. And I said to them, 'What's a matter currant bush? What are you crying about?' I thought I heard that currant bush speak, it seemed to say, 'How could you do this to me? I was making such wonderful growth. I was almost as large as the fruit tree and the shade tree. And now you've cut me down, and all in the garden will look upon me with contempt and pity. How could you do it? I thought you were the Gardener here.'....I said,'Look little currant bush, I am the gardener here, and I know what I want you to be. If I let you go the way you want to go, you'll never amount to anything, but someday when you're laden with fruit, you're going to look back and say, thank you Mr.Gardener for cutting me down, for loving me enough to hurt me."

How piercing it is when our Gardener continues to either cut us down...or allow us to be cut down; what a painful, tear evoking process it is.

One thing that Steve focused on while tending to his garden, was the weeds; be pulled, cut, sprayed, and maybe even cursed them away!!! How necessary that becomes in life...to rid ourselves of the weeds once and for all.

I have come upon an individual whom I have taken in as a father who used that theme when speaking to me regarding mine and Steve's individual and combined trials; he said, "An interesting part of a garden is the speed at which weeds grow and overtake the garden....I am constantly whacking at them with my hoe and cutting at them with a shovel. I have even tried to bury them with dirt, only to have them come back stronger and more determined to overtake the plants that I so carefully cultivate. But I have found that if I can get to the roots of those tough weeds, I have a good chance of getting rid of them permanently. At times when I have watered the parched ground, they become easy to pull up, even the deep roots."

Seems like this path we are walking, the one lined with seeds of ugliness and contempt waiting to take root, needs to be soaked in tears...healing tears, in order for the true Gardener to work His magic. It is then that weeds of sin, sorrow, heartaches, lost and forgotten dreams, and fears can be pulled. Yes, God will continue to cut us down, but He will also do it as the ultimate cultivator of our salvation. He knows what we need, what we are capable of, and how He can best look down upon us, His infant seeds, so that we may one day "produce" for Him in His Kingdom. The key is submitting to His purposes and Will...that's the hard work, once our will is His, it becomes easier to allow His Hands to do Their beautiful intricate work.

Walking With Angels

2011-07-28T20:03:00.003-05:00

I was recently given a blessing from a priesthood holder in the church; it was the Stake President here in Los Lunas, NM. It was powerful; the words he used and the voice which came through his mouth was beautiful, more powerful and gentle, simultaneously, than I have ever felt or heard before. Perhaps it was this way because the Lord was reaching out to me and allowing me to feel His Hand in my life at a time when I need it most.

We have experienced one string of "bad luck" after another in the course of our days. Steve recently lost another job, we are again living off of one income--a small one at that--and as though that wasn't enough, we need to move out of this house we currently reside in by mid August. I am so very grateful I have a job, but one can imagine the weight I feel on my shoulders as I try to contemplate how to sustain a family off of my small wage--as well as the weight on Steve's shoulders as he strives to battle the uncertainty of our future, the reality of being a stay at home Dad (again), and the sorrow over lost dreams. He loved working with the babies in the NICU...it is a very special role to fill in the hospital. I recently heard him express the sadness he is now feeling over our lost Indiana dreams...only 20 months ago...our shortened Louisiana dreams...only 12 months ago...and now our staggering New Mexico dreams.

The good thing about dreams is that they can continue...

So long as we allow our minds, and more importantly our hearts, to grasp a small thread in their making.

I went to work on Saturday night. My heart was heavy; I know a heavy heart all too well.

I accomplished my tasks--comforted my sweet little intubated baby through modern conveniences such as sedation drips, and then through the good old classic technique of cuddling, stroking, and humming soft little tunes to her. I can be caught in a child's room singing gentle lullaby's and sweet innocent tunes more often than I can count; I do not feel ashamed or embarrassed like I am in public, amongst adults, when I sing to these babes. After I spent a good amount of time talking with this child's parents, I turned and saw this arrangement sitting on the counter top.

To an ordinary person, this arrangement means nothing, but to me it means so very much.

I walked out of my patients room and found the arrangements lined up along the counter tops at the nurses station as well. I felt a surge of peace and joy sweep through me.

My sister, Sara, has always been so perceptive of our needs surrounding the anniversaries of our Baby Shane's birth and death. She sends some of the most beautiful flower arrangements for us every year as she, 2000 miles away, rejoices in the choice son we have been given and mourns over the reminder of loss we suffer. In 2009, we celebrated the anniversary of Shane's birth in December. We were living in a beautiful little town home and had just felt the blast of adversity in our life just months after making our move to Evansville Indiana--Steve was without a job, and I was pregnant, sick as ever, and working full time for our family. December 2nd came and we received this very arrangement, to remember our child.

This past weekend, as I walked the halls of the hospital, I remembered the Stake President's blessing which I received only a few weeks ago. My heavy heart was comforted in his words, as he spoke with the power of God, calling down my child to be a ministering angel to me at this time in my life. To those with ears to hear--I was walking with a ministering angel that night, and I felt him so very close to me. The flowers were simply a token of his presence.

Angels on Earth!

2011-07-19T19:45:00.003-05:00

I am not so naive as to think I am truly an angel here on this earth, but to some I may be; I guess the "some" would have to look by a great multitude of faults, but those "little some's" matter so much to me--I will claim the title if they would so honor me with it.

I was at church on Sunday. It was a good day, and Maya was particularly interested in having her way; I wasn't interested in enforcing my way, so we roamed the halls back and forth for 2 hours! We came upon a man--in his later 40's to early 50's. He was crouched down directly in front of Maya when I first noticed him. He was no taller than me, 5'2", thin, and happy as can be--yet in a squatting position with a grin from ear to ear, trying to get Maya's attention. He was successful, but Maya lost interest when she noticed I was near by and decided to come towards me and a giant bulletin board full of fascinating textures and colors. She, in her 28" glory, stood on her tip toes, braced herself against the wall with one hand, and tried so very hard to reach pastel pink Easter grass that adorned a bunny decoration--well overdue for it's decorative holiday period, but pretty darn cool to little Maya! The gentleman came in closer to me and said, "You know what I like to do? (slight pause) I like to bring them up to the level of the board so they can feel the items!" He then politely added, "Well, I don't know if you are in condition for that!" I smiled and said, "I am perfectly fine picking her up, and that is a very good idea!" I picked her up to touch the pink grass--she was thrilled.

The man then went on to ask if this was my first child; I told him that I actually have five children. His eyes became so wide, like a deer in head lights, and he said, "I'm just amazed at the work you women do. Why you don't stand three feet above ground is beyond me. Perhaps you just have too much work to do here!" He smiled a heartfelt smile, met his 8-9 year old daughter by her hand, and left for the remainder of his church meetings.

I don't think this gentleman realizes this, but on Sunday, he was sent as an angel to bear a message to me--a message I needed to hear. I was recently given such a sweet reminder, only a week earlier by a dear priesthood leader, that angels will minister to me, and that the greatest work I will do will be with my children, in teaching and loving them. I would consider this angel an earthly one who indeed did minister to me. It is amazing when you receive glimpses of the Lord's plan making itself known in your life.

So, this past week...some of my angel errands have been:

1. Running in the sprinklers with my children after a long run! I felt like a child again, I laughed like a child, hey....I am a child!!!

Almost ruined the phone with water again...almost!

2. Hugging my sad little Connor and catching a memory with him despite his "sadness" over not taking a picture when he was happy....hmmm, that one was hard to argue, so I didn't!

3. Allowing Lydia to be just like Mommy! Can you see the resemblance?

4. Admiring the girls as they picked out their shoe preferences. They sure do have class!

5. Cuddling Lydia in the rocking chair after a long first day of "sickies". Oh how I loved this cuddle time!

6. And then tending to her every need through the remaining 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 5th, and now 6th day of sickies. Guess what? Momma and Maya have it too...I guess when the girls do everything together, they will experience everything together as well!

7. Becoming the Aunt to my little sisters "angel", Christian. I have been sick and unable to see him beyond this one time...I can't wait to cuddle him on a daily basis soon!!!

8. Admiring how something so perfect cannot be completely perfect until the Resurrection...and that's okay!

9. Watching an angel take her baby under her wing--to teach him and love him in the course of his days. He is meant for great things...and she is meant to have him as a special errand in her angel tasks.

Little Girls Can Swing...Right?

2011-07-04T21:19:00.002-05:00

Lately, I've felt kinda stuck between being a woman and a little girl. I honestly would love to go back to being the little girl on the right--who is protected and cuddled in her parents arms. The one on the left...not so sure I am totally happy with who she has become. It is amazing how the weights of this world, the weights of sin, the weights of misunderstanding, and so much more, can come back and haunt you in your most vulnerable moments.

So, last week, on a particularly hard day...I went for a drive....

And when I had circled this loop we live on at least four times, I finally stopped mid circle at a school. I was the only "little girl" on that massive playground. I was alone to contemplate life and heartache. Guess what I did?

I went straight to my most treasured piece of playground equipment...the swings. What better way to become a little child again than by bringing yourself to the places and feelings of your best childhood memories?

I started out in a little sway, pushing the tips of my feet against the ground to sway front and back, left and right. I looked down at the ground....thinking, thinking, and thinking some more.

I shed some tears, and then a funny thing happened to me...

I heard a voice--not a physical human voice, perhaps the voice of a Father who loves His Heavenly Daughter deeply...it said, "Let go!"

I smiled and thought...you said it! I brought the swing up with me to a standing position, as far back as the chains would allow me, and I let go...swinging high! The higher I got, the more I felt like that little girl again. I giggled! I let the air run through my hair and felt my heart flutter in a bit of innocent fear, and then I felt pure joy overcome me as I began to laugh.

I long to feel that pure joy and peace. I want to "swing" freely and giggle again...to let go. I long to feel like the Beloved Daughter that I know I am.

And Then Sometimes, I Run...

2011-06-28T09:18:00.002-05:00

I started this morning... in all the ways I didn't want to start my day. The girls woke at the crack of dawn.; actually, every child woke at the crack of dawn. It was okay with me, however, since I was tossing and turning since midnight...waking every hour to the site of darkness. It is strange, when you need the rest, how the mind turns into and agent of it's own...leaving you to it's capacities to think, analyze, work out the obstacles of an hour, a day, a week, a lifetime.

Obstacles...I was always good at the obstacle course as a child...and I think I'm pretty good at pushing beyond my mind's limits when it comes to running a race. My sister and I have always compared our drive to RUN...train with long and hard distances...to our spirit's ability to endure long and hard roads. How ironic it is that we would be called to go through so many of those marathons in life.

I went running this morning, as I do most mornings. The girls tagged along in the jogger. Daddy was home with the boys...and though I offered to take them along, they insisted they stay home. A half mile out, Lydia stated, "My binky at home..." Normally, I would encourage her to make it the distance without it, but we just started, so I turned around and went home for the adored binky. When I got home, I asked the boys again, "Are you sure you don't want to go?" Connor jumped up and said, "Ya Mom, I want to come now..." Good boy! Aiden followed his steps, and we were off...again. We got to the same half mile mark and Connor fell...hard...hurting his knee. I told them we would ride back home and drop them off. So, I did...

And guess what I did?

I went out a third time...

I commenced the run this time on a different route to the same road I had turned around on twice before...I went the longer, harder way out. I ran further, accomplished my mileage...in record time for my SLOWEST run, but I finished.

It was hard, it was discouraging, and my body and spirit felt weak...

Life is hard...it is discouraging, but it takes great courage beyond our natural capacity to keep at it--to do things we never thought we would be capable of.

I Go Walkin'...

2011-06-27T23:23:00.002-05:00

My girls and I had a blast one afternoon this past week eating M&M's in atypical patterns...

Stick 'em to your nose and try to grab it before it falls off...

then pop them in your mouth! YUMMY!!!

Maya thought it was hilarious!

Lydia thought it was even more hilarious!

And I thought it was simply fabulous to eat chocolate with my little gal clinging to my face for a good 10 minutes!

Nothing beats the Mommy and chocolate all in one sitting (she had to be thinking that!)!!!

See...she loves me! I mean...she couldn't possibly be out ONLY to get that M&M!

Speaking of walking, Maya took her first steps on Saturday--the 25th! She would crouch down into a squat the moment any of us witnessed her new skills, tuck her little head into her chest and shy away from walking again. Today was a different story. Her clumsy little chubby body made it's way all over the house. Tiny, measurable inch like steps graced the floor rather clumsily. A flop here, a plop there, but still, she would get back up and try, try again! I couldn't help but reflect on how amazing it is to watch a baby in their first year of development. How symbolic in nature it is that we really need milk before meat, to walk before running...and in her current state, clumsy little steps only came after months of crawling, squatting and careful balance against surfaces, which she help for support often. The Lord must look upon us and beg for us to just hold onto Him for His support, but we are at the will of our own desires. When I take a step into the unknown will I stumble and fall? Sometimes, out of necessity, yes...you can't strengthen those legs without being brought way down low into a squat and them rising again; but will I have had the opportunity to stay strong and steady had I held the Hand of the Lord?

As a Mother, I am in awe over how often my children teach me about the eternities...far more often than I believe I teach them!

Tars!!!

2011-06-24T17:47:00.005-05:00

Late last night we realized that the premier of the new cars movie was coming out today. Connor went and saw the first cars movie with his Daddy 6 years ago...back in a time when he pronounced cars as "tars". I long for some of those days back...a new start.

The boys set off on their journey...after an early stampede through the house, like bunch of wild horses at 6am, stating, "Is it time for the movie yet?" They had 4 long hours to wait...and they were gonna' attempt to make it those 4 hours without food...anticipating popcorn, I guess. They caved and ate a bit of dry cereal.

Connor, my "tars" boy!

Aiden...

And the whole family playing "cars" right after they returned home from the movie!

Well, Miss Lydia stayed in her little box, in her dress...cute as can be.

I stayed home with the girls...cleaned, calmed tantrums, fed, picked up crumbs, and wished for naps that didn't happen. Hmmm....this seems to be a theme in our home; one day we'll all be able to enjoy a movie out...when it's too expensive to take all of us that is! HA!!!

Innocent TWO

2011-06-11T16:24:00.002-05:00

It's amazing how sweet and innocent our little ones truly are--especially when you look at them up against their older brother counterparts! There are amazing and wonderful things about those boys of mine as well!

Miss Lydia was eating her lunch with me. She took two bites and said, "All done!" while handing me the full bowel of spaghetti-o's! I said, "Take two more bites!" She happily nodded her head, retrieved her bowl, and said, "Take two more bites!"

Before I knew it, I was watching her take a bite, say "take two more bites", she'd take another bite and say, "take two more bites" until the bowl was almost gone! She was a happy little girl when she was done!

The girls are best friends...both much happier at the store when they are together!

We still had a few cries, tantrums, and lots of looks from people who either don't have children, are complete with their one child, or get a babysitter for shopping. I'm inclined to believe the latter does not usually occur, but I may be wrong.

I can say the shopping was done this week...a family adventure that only induced lots of stress, but the laundry will pile up and the house remain a partial mess while I start my weekend of work; I'm just not feeling very motivated to do it all this week!

I think the mini depression is starting...the one that precedes every move. I'm tired of packing, scrounging for food, money, help, and a place to lay our heads. I'm tired. Period.

Maya Ruth is ONE!!!

2011-06-08T13:34:00.007-05:00

Dear little Maya Ruth has turned one...as of last week at least!

She talks....is tempting to walk, and LOVES to eat!

At one, Maya:

Says, "Da-Da", "Dank-Do" (thank you), "Chee" (Cheese), "Maya", "Uh-Oh", and she tries so hard to say Lydia, Connor , and Aiden on certain occasions. Mama? Well, that's few and far between.

She gives kisses, and teases kisses too...such a natural little girl! "mmmm-MA" is what you hear when she's got her puckers smashed up to you! She especially loves kissing her sweet cousin Chloe!

She stands from a squat in the middle of the room but will not take a step.

She loves food and will eat almost anything in your hand. If you are eating, you better be sharing because she's also started...

...throwing big tantrums. She will sit in the middle of the floor, toss her whole body back onto the ground, flip it whole, flip it half way, and scream like a two year old. She must have learned from Liddy.

She sleeps through the night 1/4 of the time and wakes once a night around 4am otherwise.

Takes one nap a day.

Has four pearly whites.

Is 19 pounds 1 ounce (25th percentile)

and 28.5 inches long (25th percentile)

with a head that is in the 75th percentile for her age...I'd say she's pretty darn smart!

Maya was the last to wake on her Birthday, so she was greeted by the crowd....

Connor had to get her out of the crib!

She ate toast for breakfast.

Went for a run with Mommy, Liddy, and the boys...

And when I pulled out the camera to take a photo of her, she posed and said, "Chee" for the very first time!

She bounced on the wheelchair with Lydia for quite some time.

And wore a family ring, passed down from my Grandmother, Nonna!

Daddy bought her one single pink rose for her Birthday!

And she got a miniature violet that sings her lullabies at night time. She loves it!

When we started singing Happy Birthday, she threw her head down to her knees and gave a shy little grin. She was fully aware that this was her special day!

Most of our time was spent watching her eat her little heart away!

We love you Maya Ruth....

You are a bright light in such hard times!

Thank you for being...YOU!!!

Rough Starts in the WIlderness

2011-06-08T13:05:00.003-05:00

I was driving to work on Monday night. I was a little late, due to a last minute call from my manager stating that they needed me to work my call shift. I looked out and saw the sun in a pink hue...much pinker than this picture shows. The air was visibly smoky, almost to the point where I struggled to see ahead of me at certain points on the highway. When I got to work, there was ash floating in the air....all because of the 0% contained fire that blazes on the border of NM and AZ. We left Louisiana, recently stricken with floods, last summer, and have come to dwell in NM, stricken with smoke, fire, and ash. I am certain most areas of the country are facing these struggles, some environmental, some temporal, and even some are so deeply spiritual as we strive to keep our values and hold our standards in a world that is rapidly declining into territory that can only leave one desolate and longing.

I, too, am feeling a little desolate these days....feeling a sense of longing for so many reasons. I found myself scrubbing places in this house that I have never scrubbed before this morning, bringing up filth that most people don't see in a home that is relatively well maintained. Perhaps I need to dig deep inside of myself and scrub out some filth...some anger, a bit of bitterness, and lots of sorrow.

Yesterday ended a couple days of night work. When I got home I quickly rushed out the door with all four kids to get Maya to her 1 year appointment. I had meant to call Monday, to cancel, knowing I would be exhausted, but the task passed me and I was left to keep the appointment...only to avoid a cancellation fee.

It was awful.

The boys, who promised to be good, sat on the chairs in the waiting room and fought over who would get a certain chair. Connor let out a loud monster yell....a big, viscous, "RAW"! Literally. The receptionist looked at me with wide eyes, I told her "Is it obvious that I have a 6 and 8 year old sitting over there?" to make light of my frustration. She quickly receded the look and said, "I know how that is!"

In the doctors office they climbed the chairs, kicked the wall, opened drawers and closets that should remain closed, and even reached into the doctors personal space at her desk to open a drawer and grab a book out. Yes, there were merely being normal for their age....

We picked up McD's on the way home, enjoyed, and I gave the girls a bath before nap time. As I bent over, my phone fell out of my pocket and into the water...under colored water and bubbles. It took awhile to retrieve in it's camouflaged mess, but I got it.

After spending a night in rice, I turned it on to see it's at half capacity. I placed it in my pocket and it's battered mother board decided to have a mind of it's own. Suddenly it started playing a talk by John Bytheway, "Rough start, Great finish".

I smiled and thought, "How long is a start? Can is possibly be 9-10 years, if not longer?"

Immediately after, a song I haven't hear in years began playing, titled "Absence of Fear".

My heart lives in a little fear these days...but I'm certain I am being told to cast it out if we are to ever have a great finish.

Then....the battered phone decided it was finished...nothing escaped it's squeaky, worn, and rice filled speakers.

It's funny, every time I pick up the Book of Mormon, I make it all the way through the travels in the wilderness....and then I start again after a short while of not reading...only to find myself once again in the wilderness....over...and over...again. Maybe if I reach the promised land in my reading, it will be so in my life. Not likely, but maybe! :)

Summer Break Clues!

2011-06-02T16:23:00.004-05:00

It is officially summer time in the Fultz Headquarters...

and this house/family holds a lot of clues to it's sudden, abrupt, and sometimes challenging arrival. Fortunately, I love my kids to have them home 24/7 for 3 months...unfortunately, it takes a little getting use to!

Here are the clues to summer break's grand entrance:

Clue# 1--Hanging out with our friends on the couch...

EVERY...LAST...ONE...OF...THEM!

(Conveniently taken off of the top shelf of the closet by two crazy boys, all before I woke in the morning!)

I took my place with Maya on day #1 and fell asleep to morning cartoons.

Clue #2--Monkeying around. We have had one head fall accident with Maya already, and we almost had her second recently...almost!

Clue# 3--Bar-B-Q's!!!

And kisses for the cook!

Clue #4--Stroller ride naps in the hot dry sun...

...and long runs, always trailing the boys! Lately, I'm always trailing Steve too. I find myself a bit discouraged on most runs, knowing that I'm last...every time! But hey, when you're pushing a double jogger that catches the NM winds and gives you the resistance of a big orange hot air balloon in the jogger's sunshades, you can't help but be last!

Clue #5--Yummy summer food...

and experiencing yummy summer food for the first time!

I don't know what we were looking at, but I couldn't help posting the picture of Mommy and daughter...so very much a like!

Clue#6--HIGHLIGHTS!!! Whoo-Hoo! Thanks to my handsome boy, they turned out beautiful!

Clue#7--More food! Popsicles!

Clue#8--Pretty summer dresses, on a pretty little girl who is tempting us with first steps any day now!!! GO MAYA!!!

Clue#9--The boys are back...just as mischievous as they were last summer! They are teaching Miss Lydia all of their favorite tricks!

And who woulda' thought that a little 2 year old could out blow them on the milk bubbles game?

Maya even joined in on the fun!

Last but not least--Clue#10--We have to pack up and move...AGAIN!!! That makes a big # 12 since I met Steve 10 years ago!

So...we're trying to have a little summertime fun before the summertime blues kick in!

Six Years of Snoring!

2011-05-22T17:25:00.002-05:00

I remember bringing Aiden home from the hospital six years ago! He was very much different than his big brother. From day one, Connor was attached to me day and night; he slept with us most of his first year! Aiden, on the other hand, was happiest in the cradle. I laid him there one night and placed myself in bed--right beside the cradle. I wasn't close enough to the edge of the bed, I feared; one ear was free and clear from any blanket or object that would obscure my sensitivity to his whimpers and cries for food, a diaper change, or a sweet little cuddle! Only...I never had to fear missing his sound...he was snoring!!! From my very first memory, Aiden hasbeen a snoring little guy. Over the years, it progressed to daytime snoring and night terrors.

So, on the tenth, Aiden chose Daddy to accompany him to a sleep study!

He was thrilled to have a little one on one time...

A yummy bedtime snack...

and a finger flash light!!!

The reports came back and showed that he has 3 apneic periods during every hour of sleep....conclusive of sleep apnea.

He woke, a little sad, confused, and a bit angry...poor boy. I'm certain once his adenoids and tonsils are removed he will know a good night of sleep as he has never known before. I hope it helps him, in so many ways. I'm prone to believe that the sleep apnea has actually caused more problems with his growth and temperament than we ever realized until now.

Sweet Aiden, may you only become sweeter!

We love you!

By the way, he was asked to give a talk today in church...I forgot, as I always do! When I walked by the primary room, he was standing at the pulpit...silent. My jaw dropped, my eyes were wide, and I was in shock. The primary worker came to me and said that he had told her that he was ready to give a talk, so they allowed him to go up there. While up there, he looked, smiled, and began saying a few things, very quietly. Another worker prompted him a few times....and all I could do was smile, as to hide my sadness and disappointment in myself. When he finished, I went to him from behind and hugged him so tight, kissed him, and let him know how proud I was of his courage and determination to do what was right. He turned around, hugged me, blushed from ear, to cheek, to chin, and told me that he loved me. I have praised him all day for his courage....and he has smiled each and every time!

Aiden "Obii"

2011-05-17T19:30:00.009-05:00

Guess who turned 6?

Aiden Obadiah...or Aiden Obii!

The day started off with a hug and a Happy Birthday wish from Daddy! Aiden then rushed into my room as soon as Daddy left and was greeted with a big Happy Birthday from me! As his Daddy relayed to me, he had a grin from ear to ear! He ate brown sugar bagels with butter and powdered sugar sprinkled atop for breakfast, and a medley of cereals for lunch--three different kinds, together in one bowl, FULL of milk!

Aiden took a picture with his dog...the closest he can get to a dog!

Liddy was simply thrilled with the party! Can you tell? :)

Aunt "Un-tana" (Santana) and Uncle "Gave" (Gabe) came with little Chloe. (Pronounced in Little Lydia fashion!)

Papa enjoyed some pizza! I told everyone to microwave their pizza so it was warm; when I walked into the kitchen I heard a strange loud sound. I looked at Manual who opened the microwave...with the loud noise still going...and touched his pizza. I could only assume it was cold because he fumbled a little and then removed the plate from the microwave. I gracefully asked him if he would like some help. I turned off the exhaust fan and heated the pizza! The unfamiliar has a tendency to make anyone uncomfortable...it was a cute site!

Kids...being kids! I guess Gabe fits in there! :)

Mimi hugging the Birthday boy!

Aunt Sunny awaiting her Birthday Boy in a few months now!

Miss Emma fought her way out of eating pizza...because she wanted cake! It's alright Emma...I totally understand!

Lydia hung out in the chair all night long...with her buddy!

Maya devoured PIZZA!!!

I loved watching Aiden open his gifts...and seeing the present from Mimi wrapped in the funnies brought sweet memories back!

The boys were fascinated with the funnies!

Sweet spider man, oh how I love thee!

Blow...blow...BLOW!!!

He claims it took 6 blows this year....last year, it took 5!

Aiden has taught us that life is about having fun, exploring, dreaming, loving people and the great outdoors. He's also taught us that life can be about being disappointed and turning that disappointment into deep love for the offender in an instant. I cannot tell you how many times I have punished him, received a dirty look and a scream of anger from his lips...and only moments later received a HUGE hug from him. When his Daddy is feeling down, his heart is full of love and compassion for him...you will always hear Aiden say, "I love Daddy"! Tonight he gave his chocolate to his little sister, Maya, at the dinner table because Maya was crying for more food. It was his Birthday chocolate bar. He had already split it in half for him and Connor, and when Maya cried he found a way to please her. I told him that he didn't need to do that...his smile turned into a sad cry with large tears rolling down his cheeks. He said he wasn't able to eat it anymore since "Maya made it gross". Aiden naturally loves to make people happy...even when it means giving up a piece of what he loves to do, to have, or to feel, for another persons happiness.

Aiden, you have taught me more than I can teach you...I love you little dude!

Grandma Fultz

2011-05-13T20:03:00.004-05:00

It's been 9 years...as of April...since Steve and I were wed! We got away for a few days in Santa Fe, NM. The best thing we could find was a short hike to a water fall that you couldn't even get near, but...it was fun. Lovin' the matching glasses!

Steve thought it'd be funny to be a boy again, and he pricked his finger in the process!

We came home and enjoyed time with Grandma...and the kids. Maya ate her heart out...as she usually does with anything chocolate!

The boys cuddled Grandma...as though they were still 2 years younger. Connor was a bit shocked when he tried to walk up Grandmas legs, while holding her hands, and his butt fell straight to the floor. He's tall, almost eight, but still so young and innocent at heart!

Daddy sported his new glasses...looking sharp, as always!

Mommy pleased Miss Lydia by cuddling and reassuring her almost every second of the day!

And Miss Maya...ate her heart out some more. Grandma found a new hair do that suites her pretty locks well! Watch out Elvis, there's a new kid in town...and she's irresistible!

More cuddles with Grandma!

Farewell play! This was on the morning Grandma was leaving us... :(

And the boys came home to an empty house...well, a family of six doesn't create an empty house, but being home without Grandma after having her for a week leaves an empty heart. When the boys got off the school bus, they looked shocked that Grandma wasn't there...even though they were warned well in advance. Aiden got into the car and cried...no, he screamed...the entire ride home. Connor got home, and sadly read the letter she left them.

Grandma's make the world a happy place...we miss you Grandma Fultz!

Momma's Day!

2011-05-09T20:58:00.003-05:00

So, prior to Mother's Day--not even thinking of Mother's Day--Steve and I splurged a bit on fitness gear. The good thing--the hospital we work for will reimburse a certain dollar amount for us...the bad thing--well, there isn't one!!! I will refuse to feel guilt buying this jogger which will bring so many good memories for me and the girls. One of my passions in life is running, and it's easy to see that I have given it up over the last 3 years. I am now starting over and loving each step of the journey...and Steve's gonna try to do it with me! I have fond memories of running in a single jogger with my little Connor...it's so much more than a run to the children...it's good quality time and an example of good living!

So...we made the jogger a Mother's Day gift....kinda! :)

I worked all weekend...as I did last year. The hardest part for me is not being able to go to church and truly enjoy being spiritually fed. But we tried, and then my husband wrapped his arm around me and said, "You really need to go home and get some rest." With my best intentions in mind, we left...and I slept a few hours before heading in for work again.

One of the best things young motherhood offers is the ability to wipe a tear away, make a hard day...not so hard, comfort a weary soul, and instill deep love into such beautiful tiny hearts.

I am not perfect, but I love these children so much. The boys drive me crazy most days, but I am learning in my conversations with other "mother's of boys" that I am completely normal in that stance. Yet, they can be the sweetest and most gentle beings towards me. As I was carrying groceries into the house last week...I struggled with several bags, one of which had all of our cold items. Connor was tailing behind me with a few bags of groceries while the other kids sat in the air conditioned car...awaiting their rescue! Connor and I both placed our bags on the kitchen floor, and he instantly--without hesitation--and in a deep, mature (yes, he was seeking the mature sound!) voice, said, "Mom, you can put the milk away, I will take care of the rest!" He then brought every bag into the house for me leaving me to gather the girls! Voila!!! I have growing children who may add some ease to all my Mommy duties in the home!

Aiden is full of cuddles and love for me. He's a charmer!

Maya waved bye to me yesterday and blew kisses, but as soon as I closed the front door, I heard her start in a whimper...and then a sad cry followed. I usually am able to put her to bed before I leave....she never sees me actually leave for work. My heart sunk, but Mommy's love for her has instilled that deep love for another into her heart--it is a beautiful thing!

Miss Lydia has had a hard time lately...growing pains I guess! She is trying to be assertive and at times she comes off aggressive. I have to intervene, and that ends in tears and sorrow. On top of that, she is still battling a respiratory virus. I am amazed how quickly the tension rises within me when I hear her break down over and over again....but I am more amazed that the simple and humble approach of loving and cuddling her can ease her heartache in an instant. When I display frustration, she gets worse--when I simply touch her hand, kiss her head, or cuddle her tightly, she calms!

I'm so sorry you are having growing pains Miss Lydia--the emotional ones--we'll get through!

It did hit me, out of the blue, that my Shane wasn't in my arms. I walked outside when we were at church, holding my Maya, and I suddenly sensed my baby boy. I went from thinking of the ground I was walking on (I was literally thinking of how nice it was to be wearing boots while walking in the sand...to avoid dirty feet!) to a collision of thoughts that led me straight to Shane--it felt beyond my own doing. I was outside with my girl, just the two of us, and the air was still and quiet. I wonder if he was there for a moment. I shed a tear, and hoped that he could feel my deep unending love for him.

My kids made me so many pictures and cards this year...some with Daddy, and some at school. This one above is from Aiden. It is Mario from Super Mario Brothers! The top bubble says, "Wrote by mustachio!", and the bottom says "I love Moms!"

Connor wrote this letter at school...

Daddy made me a card as well...

And Aiden wrote this letter for me at school!

The top is from Miss Lydia, and the bottom from Aiden!

And guess who loves me???

Yes indeed, Connor loves me!

He came up with this entire letter with accessories all on his own! So cute!!!

I taped them all up on my cabinets here at home...

...and they will stay there for awhile! I LOVE MY KIDS!!!

Easter...alas!

2011-05-06T20:35:00.005-05:00

Easter weekend was busy, fun, and totally out of the ordinary for our family!

Lydia officially participated in the Easter prep...and we pleaded, in thought, for the Easter Bunny to visit us on another night. Mommy and Daddy were both scheduled all weekend long...the Easter Bunny was good, and came back to our house...many nights later!

Aiden chose green for his eggs...

Connor chose blue...

And in the end, most of the eggs ended up pink and purple. Having a little girl in the house--who loves to get her way--made for a pink Easter! She took all of the boys eggs, that I hadn't snatched away prior, and redyed them to her liking!

We enjoyed an Easter Egg hunt at Mimi's house...of which Miss Emma, a mere 3 years old, took first place!

Aiden took second place, and Connor was third!

I guess we can officially claim Emma as a big kid!

Lydia did well, but was a bit confused!

And Maya sat and enjoyed one orange egg while her younger cousin Chloe tried hard to snatch it up when Maya wasn't looking!

On good Friday we got together and enjoyed a feast in the good old New Mexican style...salmon burgers, shark, shrimp fritters, corn fritters, chili...and so much more!

I captured an image with my soul mate!

And I caught Mr. Connor searching for a TV show...boys!!!

Aiden stayed true to his nature...and enjoyed the great outdoors!

This is my Momma and me...practically twins!

Miss Maya ate the crumbs off the floor and enjoyed being independent!

We tried so hard to gather the kids around Mimi...but the little ones wouldn't have it, and the older ones were too intrigued with their treasure to look forward, even for a moment!

Then, on Easter morning, I took the kids to church off of no sleep. I lasted a good 50 minutes before the tantrums from my children (who did not have Easter morning chocolate) and every other families children (who did have Easter morning chocolate) finally drove me out the door. When I parked the car in the driveway...mind you, I was driving because my husband was busy working at the hospital...I instantly fell into a deep sleep. My head literally fell down, and I woke moments later to drag the kids inside...

That was the best picture I could get of them...Miss Lydia was busy walking away!

The Older We Get, The Harder We Fall!

2011-04-25T20:47:00.005-05:00

I Love my boys...they, themselves, are very loving towards me, handsome, fun, and full of surprises! Aiden is an outdoors kinda' guy...anything that deals with dirt, bugs, and plants is pretty cool to him. When we get home from school, he can't even make it to the front door. Daily, I find his bag sitting 2 feet away from the door, and a missing child--distracted by the beautiful world we have to work with!

Connor is an indoors kinda' guy. He loves to sit and relax, read, play games, cuddle, and draw. He will melt your heart with his gentle hugs and offers to help, though he usually aims for something in return. At least he is learning that kindness goes a mile while pride and anger can't even make it an inch.

So, today, they had gathered the money they found at the Easter egg hunt at Mimi's (post to follow), and miraculously came across Aiden's tooth fairy money from months ago. They combined all their single bills and change to make $20. They plan to buy a video game with it. I told them I would go and buy it tomorrow while they are at school, they just had to tell me which one it is.

But tonight...fatigue set in, and they did nothing but whine and complain...never mind the defiant attitude when it came to our nightly bedtime routine! I warned them once and then pulled back the offer to buy them the game tomorrow as a punishment for their behavior. They cried...as expected. :(

Aiden was curious if he lost the privilege too, and Connor said, "Ya Aiden, you do. It wouldn't be fair if you still had it. Tattle telling is a weird thing!" as he cried like never before. He knew that Aiden's tattle telling pushed me over the limit, and it caused a loss for both of them.

Hopefully they will resolve to work out their issues with each other instead of coming to me just to get the next one in trouble. And, in the end, I'm not that mean. I always offer a way back to what they originally desired...I wouldn't be teaching good gospel standards if I didn't. Connor usually initiates it all on his own. He read our scriptures tonight, turned out the lights, went to bed in an instant, and I know he will strive harder to be good tomorrow!

Do Not Run...

2011-04-23T16:30:00.004-05:00

I've been REALLY down on myself lately. Getting tired of the "When are you due?" comments I get. It's discouraging....to say the least. I've fallen into the bad habit of calling myself big a few numbers of times...I try not to say fat around the kids. However, I always say that I need to lose weight, and that gives the kids the impression that I am not happy about myself. There is only so much we can do...we both work long hard hours, I find myself having to stay awake for 50 hour periods at times just to help provide for my family (as I will do this Easter weekend) , and we have 4 busy children who need us ALL the time. I honestly don't know if anyone could have gone through all that we have been through over the last 1.5 years and live a perfectly healthy life....the stress alone has caused a lot of weight gain.

With that said, I was watching the last Narnia movie last weekend. Lucy, sweet little Lucy, finds a spell book and casts a spell which would transform her "reflection, cast into perfection, lashes, lips, and complexion". It would make her fair to one who holds more beauty over her...in her young eyes at least. She experiences a moment in which SHE, little pretty LUCY is no longer in existence. It is very sad....

Then, Aslan (a figure of Christ in the Narnia series) comes to her and says, "Lucy, what have you done child?...You wished yourself away, and with it, much more. Your brothers and sisters wouldn't know Narnia without you Lucy. You discovered it first, remember? You doubt your value; do not run from who you are."

I was humbled....

Beauty is only skin deep.

The worth of my soul, my family, the great work I do for them, and my God is my existence.

I failed...

2011-04-20T20:47:00.006-05:00

(BIG LOOOONG sigh!)

We have been busy bees!

Overall...I am pleased to say that the children are all healthy...finally!

I love watching Lydia become more of a princess every day!

Although, with it comes more temper tantrums and outbursts of daily tears. She was driving me bonkers one day, so I (regretfully) said, "My goodness girl, you're being a brat!" I know, it's the worst thing you can call your sweet children.. :( . She is unaware of what a brat is, and with her nature to repeat all things, and her naive little mind at work, she claimed herself....as a brat. She continued her crying and walked around with her (I'm so sorry for myself) whimper, saying, "I'm such a baaat..." over and over. I quickly stopped her and told her she was absolutely wonderful to me.

And then, in all my spare moments, I love watching my Maya grow up...my, it happens fast!

We're also taking Mr. Aiden, who has embraced his own style, to a great number of appointments....some for sleep problems, other for eyes....and the list goes on.

So, on to today....

I made lots of mistake, which can be the norm in my home!

Last night Connor handed me a paper, I brushed him off claiming I would read it later...

He got upset and said, "That's what you said last time!" (Yes, my friends, it is starting...my son is feeling I am failing him!)

I didn't read it...

Well, I did read it, but not until this morning after I drove my children to the bus and was home enjoying breakfast with the girls. It said, "Our Easter egg hunt will be Wed., the 20th at 12:30. Please bring a dozen plastic eggs with candy and a basket for your child!"

My shoulders fell.

I failed my son...again.

So, I did what any mother does...and I called my sister to let her know how crazy I am!

I made it to the school in time to deliver his eggs and Easter bag, but then I missed the bus at the end of the day.

I found my orphan boys at the school, waiting for their mother. What a crazy day!!!

As you can see, Maya thoroughly enjoyed her chocolate today....a last chance effort to keep her happy in the car!

She then took it upon herself to crawl out the front door while I put groceries away. She explored without hesitation. Her knees grew red, but her heart was so happy to be outside...on her own. Yes, she ate a stick too....my child is most definitely normal!

She knows how to cuddle her Momma!

The Hard Things in Life

2011-04-06T20:38:00.003-05:00

I've been thinking a lot lately about the person I swore I would never become--the list isn't very long, because I have, for the most part, dreamed about the person I would become instead:

I swore I would never:

1. Be cruel and hateful

2. Be lazy

3. Be chubby (the F.A.T. word sounds too harsh!)

4. Be angry and bitter with life.

I always thought I would:

1. Be a kind and gentle wife and mother

2. Be healthy and cook well balanced meals for my growing children

3. Be forgiving

4. Read my scriptures and say my prayers unceasingly

5. Become a nurse AND a writer

6. Own a home

7. Find time for every person in my life that I love and admire

There are things on both of those lists that have big red "X's" on them, in my eyes. I won't point out which ones they are...it is for me to judge, I guess, but they are there. I spoke with my sister today about the Atonement. I am certain that those "X's" can be taken away and give me a fresh start, Lord knows I need it...daily! It's easy to not be those things on list #1 when times are easy....and it's quite natural to be those things on list #2 when everything seems to be going your way....

BUT...

There are easy things in life....

and then, there are hard things!

Like forgetting your binky at home, and having a LONG day without it. Poor Miss Lydia suffered a 30 minute car ride at the close of the day. When we left the house, she was at peace; the day was still young, she was thrilled to be going for a car ride, and life seemed just perfect with a bag of cheese balls and a big cup of water. When she asked, "My binky?" and I said, "Oh honey, I think we left it at home!", she giggled and said, "Oh, Mommy, I left it at home!!!"

But then, after fatigue set in, a hungry tummy was approaching, and big brothers looked at her in just the very way she would despise, the pain of not having the binky became real. It's a bit harder to be cheerful and patient, waiting for a much desired blessing, when times get hard.

When we got home, I gave her the binky, and she hugged me so tight...she wouldn't let me go.

Our much desired blessings will have us hugging the Savior so tight one day...it'll be hard to let go!

Even more hard things :(

Poor Maya came down with a GI bug, but she also fell off a high chair head first. Her continuous vomiting had both me and Daddy concerned, so we visited the Pediatric Urgent Care. All is well with my princess. The doctor was awesome, telling me that she'll just want Mommy to hold her all night long....

and when she's better, she'll just want Mommy to hold her all night long again! He then left the room, came back in, and said, "Here, I have something for you!"

He handed me a sticker, to which I thought....she's only 10 months old, she doesn't need a sticker!

He said, "That's Mommy and Daddy!"

I started laughing so hard, it was Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog!

I said,"Ya, that's how it feels these days....Miss Piggy!"

He laughed with me, his white aged hair and rosy cheeks sparkling with light, as he gave me a friendly tap on the shoulder.

Some people sure know how to make the hard times...easy!

Much like the Savior!

By the way, I got a new chair today...love it!!!

And I had to take a picture of my antique wheel chair from my late Grandpa Don...love it too!

Saved Again!

2011-04-05T21:13:00.004-05:00

So, I helped Allen work on pulling a wire for the pump that runs the sprinkler system. I had a good time helping and got to know him a little better which was a plus as well. There was some rewiring of the electrical panel as well in order to run the pump. The Riddles are such good people and we are extremely grateful to be able to stay here and get to know them better. Anyway, we watched as much of the LDS General Conference as the kids would allow as well. It was a good weekend.

We went to use the dryer which was involved in the rewiring of the panel and it turned right on. The clothes went through the cycle and the next day when we checked the clothes, they were still wet. I tried running it again and checked the temperature of the dryer as we have had problems with it before not putting out good heat. It didn't work. I thought the dryer must have finally broke. We were getting power, so how could it be anything else.

The spirit whispered to me "There is something wrong with the wiring".

Me: How could there be? We are getting power.

Spirit: We are only getting power from one of the wires, not both.

Me: That doesn't even make any sense.

So, I called about getting a new dryer, which we really didn't need to be spending money on with all of the other bills due at the time. But, we went through with it, thinking the dryer was broken. Well, the new dryer came this morning. I took the plug from our old dryer and hooked it onto our new dryer. I hooked it all up and plugged it in. Guess what...NO HEAT! The dryer is working, but there is no heat. So, the spirit whispered again "there is something wrong at the panel". So I did what anyone would do. I called my dad. The thing is, my dad is no ordinary dad. He really is like superman. He is the superman of knowledge when it comes to all and any trade. My sister in law recently wrote about him as being like President Hinckley of the LDS church. I would have to agree. He is so selfless. He is such a good man. He would know. I knew he would. So, I posed the question. "Dad, is it possible for the dryer to be getting power, but not enough power to heat the coil?" My dad thought for a minute and then responded, "Yeah". I explained everything that happened the previous weekend and then he immediately told me the problem. I quickly finished my conversation with him, and went to the panel to do what he said. I thought to myself as I walked to fix the wiring...what are we going to do when my dad is no longer around to save our butts with things like this. I told Crystal my thoughts and she responded "you better learn it all now then". Well, after doing what he said to do, everything worked and a crisis was averted.

I learned several things through all of this though. I learned that I am not very good at listening to the spirit (and to think I had just listened to the apostles speak about that very subject). I also learned that not doing so can leave you dead broke, haha. But, I was reminded again of how much I love my father and how grateful I am for his knowledge and all that he has taught me both temporally and spiritually. I am so blessed to have two fathers who love me. All are not so lucky.